274: Find Your Story, Grow Your Brand with Melissa Hughes

Melissa: 0:00

And so when I'm like working with women that are like, I don't know my message, and I don't know what my brand is, I'm like, what's your story? And the thing is, is it's so uncomfortable.

Camille: 0:21

So you want to make an impact. You're thinking about starting a business, sharing your voice. How do women do it that handle motherhood, family, and still chase after those dreams? We'll listen each week as we dive into the stories of women who know. This is Call Me CEO. Welcome back, everyone, to Call Me CEO. This is your host, Camille Walker, and today we are diving into storytelling and how impactful it can be for your brand and the message that you are trying to convey. Our guest today, Melissa Hughes, is the founder of Rise Social Media Agency. She's a keynote speaker, a TikTok influencer with over 250,000 followers. She has been seen on shows like the Kelly Clarkson Show as well as NBC. And what makes Melissa so inspiring is that she encourages mothers everywhere to identify their voice, their brand, their story so that they can connect and grow their businesses while staying true to themselves and their families. So, Melissa, thank you so much for being on the show today. Oh, it's a pleasure. I'm excited. Yeah, me too. I mean, already we've had like this heart bond. I feel like we've been friends forever. And that's probably why you've grown so significantly on social media. You have a really beautiful way of being human and genuine. And I just really appreciate you being on the show with us.

Melissa: 1:44

Yeah, well, I love what you do for moms and for women. I feel like it's our story, isn't it?

Camille: 1:50

It sure is. It sure is. And tell me, with building a community, is that something on social media that you had planned to do for a long time? Did it happen organically? Like walk us through the story about that. But firstly, tell us a little bit more about you, your family, where you live, and how you got to be in this space.

Melissa: 2:08

Yeah, so no, it's not something that I planned. Um, my husband and I, we were actually in church ministry before we I was in any type of entrepreneurship. We had planted a church in the UK. And actually, um, a month after we moved there, which meant like we quit our jobs, sold our house, you know, left our family, he got into a horrible car accident. And we literally lived in a valley on a cemetery for four years in the UK. And um, it was just, I don't know if you've ever gone through a time where you thought it was gonna go one way, like it was gonna work out, and it just went the opposite. And it was really like it literally a valley season of our life, um, really difficult, really hard. And um, for me personally, I just ended up having this question that as a person of faith, I just started to wonder like, is God good when life is bad? And like, we can, you know, it's almost like when the rubber meets the road, you can say you believe one thing, but until it gets tested, do you honestly, is that what you really believe? And it was just this real season of going through a major identity crisis and questioning myself and who I was and all the things that you don't see on social media. And um, when we moved home in 2019, I really felt like defeated, really discouraged. And I started feeling this like unction, that's the best way I could describe it, that I should start posting videos online. And I felt like it was like I was a crazy person. I felt like I'm like, I feel like I told my husband, I feel like God's telling me I should post social media content. And the very first video I posted got 22 million views, and I ended up on the Kelly Clarkson show, and it just launched me into this whole world of entrepreneurship and branding, and I really felt like an imposter. I mean, I was getting all these people that wanted to work with me, and I was just like, this is not like this isn't me, you know, like honestly, like this, I'm not this. But doors just kind of kept opening, and I really had to realize like this was something that um I was meant to step into and and simultaneously feel like I've become more myself as I've stepped through these doors of feeling like an imposter than ever before in my life. And so I'm writing a book right now about imposter syndrome. If you can't, I have this whole message about how we're meant to feel that way when we're called into spaces that are bigger than ourselves. But um, I have loved the online space. I know some people have a lot of different feelings about it, but I've been able to connect with women like you. I feel like I've grown in myself, grown in overcoming fear of what people think, grown in courage of putting myself out there, grown in my own story and being able to share it and impact people's lives, and then also grown an income so that I can work from home and literally be with my two kiddos, which was my dream. So it's been an absolute blessing. Hasn't been easy, but it's been a blessing.

Camille: 5:27

Wow. Your very first video, 22 million. What was the video? I need to see it. I can't even imagine. I've been creating content for like 15 years, and the most, I think my biggest was 6 million, maybe. And that was like a big deal. So I can't even imagine 22 million.

Melissa: 5:44

Oh, I thought the app was like broken. I was, I was getting like my followers just like grew, and I was like, what's going on? Like I honestly, I was like, this is the strangest thing. Um, so it was a mom fail video. It was it was in January in COVID, like 2021, that I posted it because it was like the first video on my camera roll. And I had taken my kids out sledding earlier that day and just like put it, they were three and two at the time, put them on a sled and push them down the hill, thinking like, oh, you know, like they're going sledding. And then as they're going down the hill, you kind of realize like, holy crap, this is a terrible decision. Like, my kids are going at a speed that I can't control. And you can see a jump at the bottom, and then jump, the sled turns, and you can hear my daughter going, like, mommy, like it was just like this funny seven-second clip that just internet gold. Yeah, it was just a viral video.

Camille: 6:42

Yeah, that's awesome. And that's something that you can't fabricate moments like that. It's just an authentic, like, oh crap moment. Yeah. So, how were you able to then turn that into a mission of building a business around that? Because I think that that has happened to people where maybe a video like that can strike gold, so to speak. And then what do you do with it? So, how did you then turn that into massive success?

Melissa: 7:07

That's such a good question. You're answering you're asking all the good questions. I think so. Um, yeah. So it's funny because I didn't know at all what that opportunity really meant as a business owner. I didn't understand or care about going viral or what that could even do for a business. It's something that, like, if you're a business owner, it's like, hello, you just struck gold. But for me, I was like, cool, like this thing happened to me. But what I ended up finding out was there was a guy that I knew who was a business owner. And he said, Melissa, like this is a big deal. And he invited me into a coaching program, which I I'm so grateful because I wouldn't have known to do that. And I started getting around people that were better than me at business, which was extremely uncomfortable. And I started, I I one thing I did commit to doing was because I was feeling like I was supposed to be doing this anyway, kind of almost felt like confirmation, was I I got very um realistic with myself about what I could commit to posting. And I was like, look, I don't know how to create videos or anything or what my message is, but I'm just going to post three videos a week and just see what happens. And I really did kind of show up very much like, I don't know what I'm doing. And I think because it was just, and I talked about what I knew, I shared stories, I think people liked it. So my account started to grow, and so it just started to grow to 50,000, 100,000, 150,000, 200, 250,000. And I just stayed with that cadence and I stayed like consistent. So I continued posting, got around people that understood business, and literally just put one foot in front of the other, and it felt like I have no idea what I'm doing, but I'm just gonna do it. Like you're building the plane while flying it. And I think people need to hear that that is the feeling that you should feel when you're uncomfortable. And I think that feeling, people think I should know what I'm doing, and everybody else knows what they're doing, so I'm not gonna do it. When actually the only difference is is nobody actually knows really what they're doing. They're just taking action and it works out. Yeah.

Camille: 9:26

Yeah. You know what? I love hearing your fresh perspective on that because I think having been in this space for so many years prior to 2020 myself, I think that, and I know because I have a lot of friends that are in this space that a lot of us are like, we're tired. Like we've been here for a while. We know what this is, we know what that, you know, what the commitment can look like. And in a way, I envy that naivete that I once had that I'm like, oh, I'm just gonna do it. And I don't it probably I don't know if it'll work out. It may not work out, and that's okay, you know, and just being a little bit more curious and playful with it, because I think when we get too much in our heads, that's when it goes the opposite way, where you went into it and you were curious about it and you said, I'm gonna just figure this out and be new. And that's yeah, that's fine. And I think that that is so refreshing to be so open with that. I'm so it's no surprise that people relate to that too and they want to be a part of that journey.

Melissa: 10:25

Yeah. Yeah, it's funny too, because I I noticed people that have been in the industry for a really long time, and I know we're gonna talk about your like stories, but I also find that like a lot of a lot of us get stuck in an old story. Like we get stuck in what we were quote unquote known for, you know, five years ago, and we are have evolved, our knowledge has evolved, evolved, we've evolved as a person, but we feel like we can't let our content evolve because it's what our audience wants. And I think that's what like loses our spark is because we're like stuck in some same old moldborn thingy that we're like, this doesn't excite me anymore, but we feel married to it. So I think there's yeah, there's a lot to that too that I've noticed people in this space for a long time, like maybe it's time that there's an evolution. I don't like to say rebrand, but an evolution of your brand that brings life, you know? For sure. Yeah.

Camille: 11:25

Absolutely. I feel like it's every three or four years for me where I'm like, okay, ready to do something a little different. And I love that storytelling is the heart of your brand because that is if we're authentic to the story that we're telling, that is what will come through. So I would love to hear why it is such a powerful tool for women entrepreneurs, especially moms. Like, what have you seen in your experience with helping people through your brand mapping method?

Melissa: 11:52

Yeah. Can I tell you a story to illustrate the point?

Camille: 11:56

Yes, please.

Melissa: 11:57

I mean, yeah, that's what we want to hear. Well, yeah, because I think stories, so people connect with stories more than information. So I feel like if I tell the story, it'll hit the point better than if I were to explain it. But I had a client come to me a couple of years ago, and he was he was pretty well known around his circle, you know, and he came to me because he wanted to grow his brand and he had a brand called being unstoppable. And he had merch, you know, and he had this whole thing about like go after your purpose and be unstoppable and like a pretty clear message. But he's struggling to grow, struggling to get his name out there in a bigger way. And so we get together and we meet, and I'm asking him, why unstoppable? Like, why did you choose that name? He's like, Well, because you know, you just want to be like, oh, unstoppable, and blah, blah, blah, blah. And he just keeps saying the same thing. So eventually I'm like, I get it, but like, why? And I almost felt like I had to like pull, like I was trying to pull teeth. And eventually he kind of gives up and he goes, Okay. He goes, I've I've really never told anyone this before. Um, he said, and I should actually like say a you know, trigger warning. Um, I'm not we I always forget to say that, but people's stories are real, and this is really real. But it I'm just gonna give you a trigger warning for anyone listening, um, on around the mind of mental health. But he said that there was this there was a season in my life that I I almost took my life. And I said, really? He said, Yes. Um, he's like, you know, I was just so defeated, and all this, all this, all this goes into the whole thing. And I said, You've never told anyone that story? He said, No. He's like, I don't feel like I could tell that story because I'd lose credibility, people wouldn't understand. And I said, So, like men's mental health, he goes, Oh, you should hear about it. And he just starts listing all these statistics about, like, I mean, he knew them like the back of his hand about men's mental health. And I said, Did you know you don't have a brand about purpose, which you do, but really you have a brand about mental health? And he was like, Oh my gosh, you're right. And I said, Your brand is about being unstoppable because you're passionate about helping men understand the things that are that want to kill them on the inside, all the things that try to stop them, their fear, their doubt, their worry, right? And I said, Can you imagine if you had a message that was more holistic like that, how it would be way more relatable, way more make more sense, be more sticky. And so I said, When you go to your next networking event, I want you to tell your story. So you know what? He did, and he ended up telling his story at a networking event and got an opportunity to talk to somebody about getting booked to speak at the Olympics because they were like, We don't have anybody talking about men's mental health. I love your story. Thank you so much for being vulnerable. Most men aren't vulnerable, which he knows. And so when I'm like working with women that are like, I don't know my message and I don't know what my brand is, I'm like, what's your story? And the thing is, is it's so uncomfortable for women to like lean into their story because it's vulnerable, it's real, it's authentic. We would rather, we'd be more comfortable kind of being like, you know, kind of how he was like unstoppable, you know, but it's not real and it's not relatable. And it doesn't bring that clarity like understanding your story does. So that's why I'm so passionate about it.

Camille: 15:37

That is such a good example. I love that it's kind of takes it from being a bumper sticker of like rah-rah to like the real underneath of what created that desire within him to start it in the first place, that why, which I very much believe in identifying your why. And I love that you brought up that it can change. And I think that a lot of times when I have coached women or talked to women through the years, they can get stuck, like you said, in, oh, but if I choose this, is this what I want to do forever? Is this who I'm always going to be? And I love the idea that you can change your mind, that you don't have to stay with one thing forever, which I think people, even just giving them, I guess, air quote permission to do that is like, oh, I can I can do that, or even reminding myself, like, oh, I can change my mind, and that's okay. You know, you don't have to stick with something forever.

Melissa: 16:31

For sure. I totally agree with you.

Camille: 16:34

So for the mom who's listening and feels like her story is too ordinary or maybe too messy or too similar to other people's, like, what would you say to them who are trying to identify that within themselves?

Melissa: 16:48

I have worked with so many women, I mean hundreds. I've never met someone that has an ordinary story. So I'll just say that. What I would encourage people to think about, because a lot of times we think about um events. So you might like you're listening to my story and you're like, oh, Melissa's story is cool. She lived in a valiana cemetery and she got on the Kelly Clarkson show. I can see why she's passionate about sharing it. Good for her. But listen, a lot of people focus on the external events that are happening. If you feel like your story is ordinary, I would encourage you to focus on what's called the psychographics of your story. What is that? It's the internal world that you've walked through that have maybe on the outside, you know, could be very, you know, not exciting. But the story is what were you struggling with? What was your mindset? What did you believe? And then what happened that caused you to have to go through this internal journey that made you somebody else? I could give you another example. I know someone, um, she's a client of mine, she's fantastic. Her story might look very ordinary. She's a mom, she's got children, she launched um a hair salon. Well, her story really starts out with feeling very much, like feeling like she didn't belong, like she didn't fit, um, never being able to get things done in an orderly fashion, kind of felt behind in other areas, never felt like she was the it girl or on the in crowd. Immediately, how many people can relate? Even as I haven't even finished the story. She ends up realizing one day that she's always struggled with ADHD. And it completely changes her life, where she's like, wow, like there's actually a term. Like there's a term for the like me, people like me. And she launches this hair salon that's essentially all centered around helping women who feel a little bit odd, a little bit different, who feel like they don't fit into the normal, like it girl crowd, come into a salon where they can feel celebrated and seen and like they're themselves. And so it's like immediately the story is so much more interesting and connects to a deeper mission that I'm like, oh, I'd go to her salon a thousand times more than going to just like Joe Schmo down the road where I can get a haircut because of the can the emotional connection. And so I would encourage any mom that's listening, like, what did you believe before motherhood? Like, what's your passion? Think about this. What's your passion? What did you believe before that caused that to get birthed inside of you? And what did you have to go through internally? What mindset shifts did you have to make? What were you challenged with in your in your thinking and your belief system that brought you to this new open space that might be internal, but it's a transformation. And that's the story.

Camille: 19:44

I love that. I love that how you broke that down of what are I think a lot of times they say that we can lose ourselves in motherhood and we forget what are my hobbies or what do I even like anymore, or what are, you know, you kind of get a little bit lost in that where our days can become monotonous, or the fact that we're serving other people's needs and wants and desires and even putting a lot of our money and effort into our kids' lessons, right? Where we would buy a new outfit for our kid in a in a heartbeat, but for ourselves we wear the same bra for five years. You know, it's like that's so true. I think that it's really a fun exercise to think back to that of like, what did make me really excited as a kid? And what did I naturally gravitate towards? I saw a story that someone shared recently about um, it was a mom saying, I celebrate my children in their natural effort of something that they love. And the example that she gave was she has a daughter who gets in trouble for talking a lot, which hello, I totally relate to that. And she said, But I filmed her talking about how much she loves to talk to people and engage with people. And I said to her, you're going to make money talking to people someday, or the way that you communicate with others is going to serve you in being this person. And then for her son, he's very into building and tearing things apart. And she said, I could see him being an engineer. And I film him having those moments of joy in doing the thing that he loves to do because it's a core piece of who he is before the world infiltrates that by saying, This is who you should be or this is the way you should think. So I love that idea. And really, I think that that does take work on our part because it's so much easier, again, for us to look at our kids and be like, oh, but look, look at what they are naturally so good at. Where I think sometimes it takes extra effort, if not an outside voice of people helping guide you to discover what those things are.

Melissa: 21:39

You know, I love that. And that is actually one of the exercises that I encourage my clients. Um, if, and I totally relate. I remember my before I went on this journey of personal branding, my husband would ask me, Where do you want to go for dinner? And I would just be like, Wherever you want to go. I couldn't even answer the question. I mean, I was so disconnected from myself. And I had to go on this real journey of trying to be like, what do I like? Do I even have any hobbies? Like, yes, who am I? Like this whole thing. And one of the exercises live too that I encourage my clients to do, number one, is you make a list of a hundred things that you love. And when I say in that list, things that you that bring you joy that you want to do, things that you like. Like I love a cup of coffee, you know, I love sitting with the sunshine just to connect with yourself. And then the other list or the other thing is you go and you ask someone that's known you for a long time, ideally a parent, if you, you know, if they're still alive or you have a good relationship, or a best friend that's known you for a long time, and you say, What was I like when I was little? And you just find out and listen for what they say. Like, what was my personality like? What was what were my interests? Because it's such a pure version of who you are uniquely created to be that can be expressed today, but you know, in an authentic way that we oftentimes cover up through people pleasing and you know, trying to be somebody and make a living, you know, that gets lost in the process.

Camille: 23:16

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Melissa: 24:53

Yeah, I love that. That's so cute.

Camille: 24:55

Yeah. So you've shared that building your business has reshaped how you show up as a mother. And as we're speaking to a lot of moms here, what would you say are some key takeaways that you've learned in building the business, but also staying present with your kids? And how old are they now? I'm guessing they're like seven, eight, six, seven, something like that.

Melissa: 25:15

Seven and my daughter just turned nine. Oh, okay. So, oh, sister, I had this horrible fear before I became an entrepreneur. I was like, if I do this, I might become a bad mom. And that really held me back until I like confessed it to somebody. And they said, Where, why do you think that? I said, Well, I just feel like, you know, it'd take my time away, or you know, I'd be so wrapped up in that. Like just all the images I think that the media portrays of women that work. And she said, But what if you could be a great mom and a great business owner? And I just remember thinking, like, can I have both? Like, could I actually have both? And I'll tell you what, Camille, I have seen how being a business owner has made me a better mom because it's taught me leadership. And I don't think moms see themselves as a leader, but like, let me just tell you, okay, this is this is my mom's visiting right now, and she that we woke up this morning and the kids are like doing their morning routine, and she's like, Well, this is busy, and it's busy because I have my kids trained on how to get themselves ready in the morning. So, like, what I notice and what I used to do is I did everything. I did everything, right? But then when you become a business owner, you start to like understand this amazing key, which is delegation and the importance of delegating. So now I have trained my children. Um, they have to do the five B's, and the five Bs are you have to be dressed, brush your teeth, make your bed, do your backpack, and have breakfast. And if if you have all those things done, then you can watch your tablet. And we've also, because they're a little bit older now, we've included the dishwasher. So my husband or my son unloads the dishwasher and um they make their own lunch, right? So I don't do any of it, I do none of it. And some people might be like, Well, you're a lazy mom. No, I'm not. My kids are learning confidence. I mean, they they go to school and they're like, I make my own lunch. And so I have, yeah. Um, and we have like a schedule. So like Monday's sandwich day, Tuesday is crackers and meat day. Uh, Wednesday, they make macaroni from on the stove, not microwave, on the stove. And we've like practiced and learned how do you cook in the kitchen, you know, like just training them and they're efficient. And I was saying to my son, I was like, you are a capable, contributing member to this society. And I just want to thank you for that. And he's proud of himself. Yeah. And we, you know, so like I've just been amazed that like learning like business stuff, and like, wow, I should implement this in my home. Like, what are my systems? What are my processes? Right. The team know, you know, are they cued in? Have they been trained? So they're trained, and it makes for a very peaceful, happy morning. So I was able to get dressed, put makeup on, so I could be with you.

Camille: 28:19

Yeah, I love it. I actually my kids make their own lunches too, and I'm all about them getting themselves ready and feeling capable, and they know their schedule. And it helps so much, honestly, too. When I have older kids now, my youngest is nine, but my oldest is 17. And he grew up that way too. Like, if I need some help, like last night I wasn't feeling well, and he made dinner for himself, my younger son who had football, and for me, and he said, Mom, I made you dinner and I fed Jensen. And so now three of the six of us are fed. And I was like, that's amazing. And I didn't ask him to. And I think that it honestly came from earlier years of teaching him to take a look around and to take care of himself in those ways. So you're doing awesome. I love that.

Melissa: 29:07

Thank you.

Camille: 29:08

So tell me a little bit about teaching other people about building teams and processes within their business. Cause I know that that's something that you help women with as well.

Melissa: 29:17

Yeah. Gosh. Well, there's so much to that. I feel like that is something that you're like, man, what are my systems? What are my pro? I remember hearing podcasts like this and be like, what's a system? Like, what does that even mean? What is a process? Like, what is that? Um, I would say when you're in your early years, so depending on if this is a if we're talking to a mom in their first three years of business, right? You and I both know you are building the plane while flying it and you're just trying to figure it out. Um, that is not to say that there's not excellence or you don't try and capture processes. But I will say I found so much freedom when I would speak to old. Women in business, and then and I told them, Oh, I've started, and I was feeling so like behind, and they're like, No, like you're doing great. Like, I think the goal is just take action and take action that moves the needle forward, like calling people, pitching yourself to speak on stage, putting content out there, not watching a training. You know what I mean? Like, yes, watching a training is when you're folding laundry and you want to do that to learn. I'm talking taking action, like actually moving the needle forward. Um, but yeah, and then once you're kind of past that and you've kind of figured out some things that are working, I found it very helpful to capture processes. What do I mean by that? I think I spent a lot of time, me and my team, where we were trying to like create a process. But when something's working, you're like, wow, how did we do that? And you literally just go on Zoom, and however you did it, you just record yourself doing it, and then you can share it with the team and say, this is how we do it. And that can be stored in like a Google Drive folder or whatever. Um, I mean, very simply, just to like make it very tactical. Um, the very first system that I came up with for my content was what I'm posting on each day. So it would be like Monday would be a talking head video, Tuesday would be a testimonial, Wednesday I'd be promoting something. So, like, you know, promoting a product or promoting um my podcast. When a Thursday would be another value forward talking head, and then Friday would be a personal post, and then I don't post on the weekends. So even just that, like if you're if we're like just just talking about social media, that is a very helpful system because then it takes the mental gymnastics out, and you're like, Mondays, I know what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna post a video of me talking to the camera. Tuesdays, I'm gonna talk about a client and how I've helped them. Wednesday, I'm promoting this. So if you don't have anything like that, I would really recommend like just think that through and decide. And that way you don't have to be like, what am I what are we having for dinner? Or, you know, what am I posting today? Or, oh, we have a client inquiry. What's our next step? It's like you kind of know because you've decided and you've captured that process.

Camille: 32:22

That's really good advice. I love that. And I love that you say capturing the process because it's not always reinventing the wheel. I think that that's a really interesting way to think about it when I was learning how to do when I went to school, I went to school to be a teacher, and we were asked to create a scope and sequence, which you could apply this to a business or to social media, where it's like, what's the overall picture? And then breaking it down to what are the lessons within the scope and sequence. And so what's interesting, and a number one thing that I took away from that when I was in school for that is to not recreate the wheel. So what they'd say is they back then, this is like early 2000s, they'd pull out this big file cabinet and be like, here are the lessons around that topic that have been created. You can leaf through it and see what works for you. Don't re-recreate everything. And I remember being like, oh, there's like already a cheat code. And I think that this can apply so much to our businesses or our family in terms of what has worked, what is working well, or what has other people done that is working well, and then apply it to yourself in that way, where it's not always about coming up with something new and shiny every time. It's doing what works.

Melissa: 33:38

Yeah. I mean, we've done the five B's since they were like four and three. I love that. And I it works. It's like do the five B's, and they're like, Can I watch a show? Not after your five B's are done.

Camille: 33:49

It's like it's our system. That's so good. I'm gonna write those down. That is perfect. So, with all of the growth that you've had, how do you stay focused in terms of like what you want to do moving forward? How do you stay focused for yourself?

Melissa: 34:04

Okay, this is like the best question ever. Um, at the beginning of the year, I I think a lot of people think like, what's my word for the year? Or like, what am I gonna focus on? My big thing was less, which a lot of people are like, What a negative word. I uh am really passionate or am really um just find it as to be a strategy to say no. And um, I've had the opportunity to do other like to do other opportunities or other things. But I think if you can like a big mantra for me this year was like one thing to one million. It's like I'm gonna have one offer. I'm gonna have just one thing I'm doing and I'm gonna scale it to one million. And am I at a million yet? No, I'm not. But what it's done for me is it's helped me to focus and say no to things that seem like a good idea, but either are not in alignment with my season. What I mean by that is like I've got little children. I'm not gonna be traveling and doing speaking stuff all the time. So I'm probably gonna say no to some stuff. Um, because it's not, I I care more about being at home with them right now. So I'll do the podcast, you know? I'll do my content, but I won't be saying yes to those other opportunities as much. Um also, like just because some, just because you're invited or it's a good idea, just really like, does it really line up with that vision and where you're going? I think so many of us are so desperate to make a name or to be successful that we will say yes to things that in our heart of hearts we know I probably should have turned that down or I probably shouldn't have done that. And I just really want to give per women permission to be like, yeah, just say no. Like, literally, no. That's it. That's all you have to say. And focus on like what's the one thing? And for some women, it's like, I just want to write this book. It's like, okay, then just do that and do it within the hours of your values or your boundaries. Like, I I'm gonna be done working at three. Why? Because my kids get out at 3:30 and I wanna take them to the trampoline park, you know? Yeah, so like I have about 46 emails that I'm not gonna get to today, and I'm okay with that. And maybe it might, you know, I might have to go back to somebody and be like, hey, I'm sorry for the delay. But for me, I have this conviction that I'm I'm doing this to be a good mom. And if that, if that's gonna somehow hurt my business or communicate, you know, and I'm I'm not saying not be excellent, like have processes around stuff, but I just I'm really clear about what are my values, what are my things, what am I okay with letting go of, and just like taking the time to get honest about that stuff and don't sweat about the other things. Um, yeah. So I just think about your values, what's most important, and what's the one thing that's gonna help reach your goals, and then just say no to the rest of the stuff and know that you're worth it. And I have this belief God will promote you at the right time. You don't have to promote yourself. That growth and that promotion will come when you're ready.

Camille: 37:27

I love that. I love that that freedom of saying no and and not feeling like you have to make an excuse for that, where there has to be like, you know, I think as women especially, we're so used to serving and giving that it is hard. It is harder for us in general to say no. So I really appreciate that perspective. And I want to hear a little bit more about in terms of the imposter syndrome, you said you're writing a book about that. What was the one mindset shift that helped you to go from imposter syndrome to the confidence that you needed to move forward?

Melissa: 38:03

Yeah, okay. So the short answer to that is um imposter syndrome, as long as it's rooted in authenticity, is a good feeling to feel. Because I truly believe that unless we're gonna grow and step into bigger things and do more, we are meant to feel like impostors. And obviously, I'm a person of faith. So I do believe that God calls you to do things sometimes that you're like, I'm not qualified. But for whatever reason, it's what you're meant to do. For example, I do not have a business degree, I do not have a marketing degree, I didn't go to school for content, social media, la la la. But I have like I think I've I've always been a talker. So the kid that's always talking in school, I've I've never felt that I've been a good communicator. So I always would just tell stories. And and so, like this whole storytelling thing, I had no idea I was such a great storyteller because I always thought I was just a bad communicator. So, like people would ask me stuff, and I'd be like, Well, let me just explain to you through a story. And I had no idea, like that was actually a superpower, yeah, you know. Um, and now I'm getting booked to speak on storytelling, and I'm a quote unquote great communicator because I know how to tell a story. And so I think that there are things that qualify us that are so natural to who we are that we don't see it, and then sometimes a door or an opportunity will open for us that it's like, man, I was born to do this, or I'm really good at this, but we're not quote unquote qualified by the world standards, or we don't have the degree. But maybe that feeling of feeling like an imposter is actually helping you to become more of who you've always meant to be. And so I'm writing a book on authenticity because that is the antidote to imposter syndrome. The the bad kind of imposter syndrome is when you actually are being an imposter. You're trying to get into rooms that you don't belong in because you're chasing success or what you should do, or maybe your parents told you that you should do this. And so you're doing it and it feels off, probably because it is off. And I have found that I have stepped into this space that has felt very uncomfortable, very outside of myself, but I've never felt more like myself. I've never felt more comfortable in who I really am. I and it came through this feeling of I don't, I'm not qualified. And so I think that both can be true, both are uncomfortable, one is rooted in authenticity and opens doors and leads you into bigger spaces that cause you to feel more like yourself.

Camille: 40:48

I love that answer. I wasn't expecting you to say that that imposter syndrome can be a gift. I think that's a really cool way of looking at it.

Melissa: 40:56

Yeah. I mean, if you think about your journey, have you have you ever experienced imposter syndrome? Like starting the podcast, and you're like, I'm so glad I did. I'm actually loving it and I'm really good at it and I enjoy it. But there was a moment where you're like, who am I?

Camille: 41:10

Oh, more than once, multiple times. Right. Throughout my life. Oh, for sure. Because you're we're all, I love the idea that we're all everyone that started that is an expert started as someone that was brand new. And so that's you know, everyone has to start at that spot at some point, right? So why not you? Right.

Melissa: 41:30

And I would say the difference would be if your parents or a friend or somebody was like, you should start a podcast, and the only reason why you're here is because somebody else is pushing you to do it. That's where it's like crisscross applesauce, no, thank you. This doesn't feel good. I am an imposter because I'm being a fake. But if that's not the case, then pull up a chair, sister. You're right where you're supposed to be. Yeah.

Camille: 41:55

You know? Yeah. I love that. So if you could tell a Montpreneur one thing this week to clarify her brand and her impact, what would that be? Like, what's a takeaway? I know you've already given us quite a few, but if you could narrow it down to one, what would it be?

Melissa: 42:12

Um, I would say to go take an inventory of your, there's so many things I could say. I'm gonna leave it with one thing. Take an inventory of a moment in your life that was a defining moment. And when I say a defining moment, it's where something in you shifted, or maybe like you're never the same again. And that could be a situation happened, it was a belief system that changed, it was something that you found out. And I want you to think about how that plays a role in your passion. And you might not see a correlation, but I promise you, in some way, there is a correlation to that and the mission that you're called to be on. And if you can formulate your story around that and understand how that is what's leading you into where you're meant to be, you're you're on the pathway to discovering your personal brand and your mission and your message that you're meant to carry into the world.

Camille: 43:07

Oh, I love that. That's really good advice. Now, tell us where everyone can connect with you online or just to hear more about what you have to share.

Melissa: 43:18

Yeah, so uh I'm everywhere. I really do mean that because I have a social media agency. So the team helps me out, but it's at Melissa Lea Hughes as my handle, and Lee is spelled L-E-A. Um, so Melissa Lea Hughes on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, um, LinkedIn, and I do have a website, Melissa LeeHughes.com, and my agency where we do we have a social media agency helping mission-driven women grow personal brands, and that's Rise, Rise Social Media Agency. Awesome.

Camille: 43:53

And how many people are on your team that you have with you right now? 13. 13 of you. Is that including you? Yeah. Okay. And what did that take a long time to build those 13 or any advice on how to build a team around you? I'm like, tell me a little bit more about that. Oh my gosh.

Melissa: 44:13

This is like the worst answer, I feel like, but this is the truth. I got, I really feel like I got lucky. Um, I some I at it was at the right, I was at the right spot at the right time. I met a guy who was selling a business and he had asked me, Melissa, it was after my first year in business, Melissa, how are you enjoying being an entrepreneur? And I was like, I don't. He was like, You don't? I was like, no, I'm on the calls all the time and I'm managing people's accounts and I'm fielding questions. And he goes, You should just hire a team. And I was like, Oh yeah, you should just hire a team. Yeah, like I know how to do that. I don't know how to do that. And he said, Well, I just sold my business and I know somebody that's really good with systems and processes. I could introduce you to her. So I said, Okay. And he introduced me to her, and her and I started. And from there, we just brought on another person and another person. And so I would say, and the beautiful thing is, I mean, she carries my heart, I carry hers. She's she's actually so that my team is in the Philippines. Her name is Red, and she's a mom, she has three children. She is gold. Like, if I could say gold with a capital G, she's gold, and she's good at everything that I'm not. And but we have the same heart, the same mission. So I would say, like, to if you're gonna hire someone, I would like ask around to people that you know that are already have a team, ask them, how did you do that? How did you find people? Like, just start there. And then if they have someone or they have a recommendation, talk to them. And you wanna find someone that's good at everything that you're not. Yes. A lot of, you know, a lot of people hire people that can do what they do. No, don't do that. She's amazing at systems, processes, and operations. So if you're an entrepreneur, which most people are more visionary, find someone that's good at that and make sure that they carry your same heart. And I would say that's a good person to start with.

Camille: 46:17

I love that advice. Well, this has been absolutely amazing. I could talk to you forever. Thank you so much for sharing. And there is one, two questions I actually ask every guest. And one is what are you reading, watching, or listening to? You can answer just one of those or all three. And then the other is a motherhood moment that you'd want to share.

Melissa: 46:35

Oh gosh. Oh man. Okay, motherhood moment. I'll start there. Um, and this is just the first that popped in my head. But the other morning, I um I gave my son like a kiss on the cheek, you know, and he's getting a little older now. And so I said, Buddy, are you like, do you not like mama's kisses on your cheek? And he goes, No, mama, take it, take it. But he's just like, I'm just letting me like kiss them all over. And so I just loved that. Cause I don't know how much longer I'm gonna have the take it, mama, take it. And just like so sweet, totally letting me just smother him with kisses. But that just that was more for me. So thanks for letting me share that. Um, and what am I reading or listening to? Um, man, I am I love Forrest Frank. I just think he's awesome. He just his lyrics and everything. I love him. Um, I'm not a big TV person, so I don't have an answer there. And then reading, I I love Joe Olstein, and I'm reading his book, I declare, which is essentially affirmations about like positive things about your life. So, yeah. That sounds very interesting. Very cool.

Camille: 47:45

I love that. Well, again, thank you so much, and thank you to everyone who is listening. If you found this helpful, please share, leave a comment and a review, and check out Melissa so you can be inspired from her forevermore. Thank you so much for being here. We'll see you next time. Hey CEOs, thank you so much for spending your time with me. If you found this episode inspiring or helpful, please let me know in a comment in a five star review. You could have the chance of being a featured review on an upcoming episode. Continue the conversation on Instagram at callme CEO Podcast. And remember, you are the boss.