Hack Your Brain to Create Patterns of Success | Kiri-Maree Moore | Decision Velocity Global

KIRI-MAREE MOORE [0:00]

And I think that's the best advice I can say to a mom is love yourself and be that role model with what you've got in your hand.

[MUSIC]

CAMILLE WALKER [0:17]

So, you want to make an impact. You're thinking about starting a business sharing your voice? How do women do it, that handles motherhood, family, and still chase after those dreams? We'll listen each week as we dive into the stories of women who know. This is Call Me CEO.

[MUSIC]

CAMILLE [0:36]

Hey, everyone. Today is a good day. We are talking about how to set up patterns for success and be a leader in your field. I had such a good time talking with our guest today. She is an expert in brain patterns. And after we got off the call, we actually talked about something that was really fascinating to me and that was about setting up brain patterns for success. We talk specifically about times when you're going to bed at night or closing up shop for the day and how to avoid rethinking and repeating in your mind something you could have done or could have said that keep you up at night. I don’t know if you ever have times like that, but she shares this pattern with me.

And by the way, this is Kiri-Maree Moore. She is the CEO of The Leaders Movement and Decision Velocity Global. And she said that if she has three things on her to-do list and there's anything else that needs to be done, she thinks for herself in that moment, is there anything else humanly possible that I could have done? And if there is, she will shoot off that quick email or a quick text, and then know when it's time to stop.

And then, she sets up a system where she thinks of what could be done now, soon, and later. And the way that she puts that together is that now is actually tomorrow, so you move that thing that didn't get done today to tomorrow. Soon would be the end of the week or the weekend, the next seven days. And later is in the next 89 days. Why it's not 90? I'm not sure. You'd have to ask her, but specifically putting it in a safe place knowing that she will finish it later or that eventually that thing that she couldn't quite get to now, soon, or later will fall off the map and it wouldn't have been a priority anyway. So, we're going to dive into that a little bit talking about priorities, pillars to help you get where you want to go and how to be curious about what it is that you want.

Now, this episode is hosted and sponsored by Mountain View Village which is a new lifestyle center in Riverton, Utah with Phase 1 opening including Orange Theory, StretchLab to work out and stretch out this year, The Smooth Shop, HomeGoods, and more. I will tell you that we recently were there with the most recent opening of the Red Door which is an escape room center. So, you go in. They actually have family friendly escape rooms, so you can go and experience it as a family. We did a carnival-themed escape room and it was so much fun. My kids cannot stop talking about it. And all month long, they are doing a 50% off entry. So, if you get online and go to the Red Door Escape Room, you can get 50% off and that is in the Riverton area. So, check that out. It is so much fun. We cannot wait to go back and creating moments like that that matter with your kids is what life is all about and squaring down what it is that you need done and what needs doing. We're going to talk about that today. So, let's dive in.

Welcome back everyone to another episode of Call Me CEO. This is your host, Camille Walker, and I am so excited because today we are speaking with Kiri-Maree Moore. She is the CEO of Decision Velocity Global where she helps leaders shortcut to success with creating patterns to rewire your brain in a way that makes you as successful as possible. And talking to her, we've already done an interview before where I was on her podcast, the DECISION Table and the way her brain works is just so inspiring. I feel like I just need to jot down everything she says. So please, if you're listening to this right now, take the opportunity if you can to take some notes on your phone or a pen and paper because we're going to dive in. So, thank you so much for being here with us today, Kiri-Maree.

KIRI-MAREE [4:36]

It's so much fun and so exciting to be here. We had a lot of fun on my podcast, so I can just imagine we're going to have a great conversation today.

CAMILLE [4:47]

Yeah. Just a couple of gals chatting and I'm looking at both of us we're talking about early mornings, fitting things in, running around, doing the crazy lifestyle. And I know you mentioned that you are a mother of six and something that we talk about on my podcast specifically is about the balance of motherhood, how you found your journey to where you are now. So, take us a few jumps backward to where you started and what led you to where you are now.

KIRI-MARIE [5:14]

Firstly, yes. I’m a momma of six kids and also three grandbabies, so been around that nurturing feel for a little while now. And let me tell you the journey, it never runs away from you. It's always fun. It's always got its challenges. It's always got its learnings. And I think that was the best thing that I could have learned from a lot of my life.

So, I wasn't one of those kids that grew up in that beautiful home, the red roses with growing outside, the white picket fence. That wasn't my lifestyle. In fact, I went in and out of homes from a very, very young age. I was put up for adoption right from birth. So, I didn't always have a great role model to what family life looked like. I didn't understand what love was and healthy relationships. And so, for a lot of life, it was a real challenge. It wasn't easy. It was very much I didn't like where I was heading and what it looked like.

But one of the things I did see was there were glimpses of other people that seem to have life a little different, seem to do it differently, and seem to get different results. And that became my fascination going, okay. If someone else can do it, and they don't necessarily come out from a handout or a got it all from the beginning, they also have had challenges, maybe there's a different way I could do it. And that became my journey of going, okay. I know this is what has been dealt at this moment, but what if it wasn't what I was dealt? What if I could actually change some of the things, some of the outcomes and do it differently? Would I be able to have a different life? And I always thought that one day, I'd have kids and I never wanted my kids to grow up the way I did or not have access to maybe things in the way of education and opportunities. And I thought for this to happen, some things are going to have to change.

CAMILLE [7:39]

What age was it that you looked around and thought, "I want to become a student of people, looking at behaviors and changing my own circumstance?" So, what age was that for you that you said that and wanted to make that different?

KIRI-MARIE [7:54]

Yeah. I always say it's always been crossroads. There's been crossroads that have happened. I remember literally at 16 being on death's door and I had a really big decision to make. And I thought, is this life really worth living for? And I remember that making a big impact on, okay. If this life is worth living for, I better find out what life really means. I better find out what it would mean to live life in a way that is awesome. And so, that began a journey.

But I reckon that it really didn't happen until I was in my early 20s. And I remember being my 21st and it's the only birthday I've ever celebrated. I've had some little celebrations, but this was the big celebration. And I remember looking around and going, I know these people, but they don't really know me. And that was frightening because it was almost like I was living a life that I was living to keep everyone else happy or what I thought would keep everyone else happy, but I didn't feel happy in myself. And I certainly knew they didn't know me and they had no idea about what I've gone through, what I was thinking inside of me.

So, I began this journey going, okay. Obviously, this pattern isn't working for me. If I change up and figure out how to rewire my brain to some different behaviors, maybe I'm going to change that result. And I was doing a lot of work with young people, so a lot of gangs, street kids, the low social eco environment. And so, there were a lot of amazing programs and I was a youth speaker for many years. And I remember it being awesome when I was there. Lives were being changed. Actually, no because when they went back to their normal life, they went back to the normal things, their default systems. And so, nothing ever changed.

So, I realized all I was doing was band-aiding. I wasn't fixing. I wasn't changing. And so, that's when literally I was like, I'm wasting my life. This is not a real change. What if I could really change that? And that's been my fascination ever since going, how can I really help youth to look at the patterns? Look at where you want to go, but look at the patterns to where your brain is wired and go, what if we wire to these things? This will change. It'll give you different solution pathways and it's my whole life's work.

CAMILLE [10:51]

Okay. There's so much to unpack there because I feel like you are very passionate about systems and setting up for success. Has there been a leader in your life that helped guide you to finding these patterns or did you find them on your own?

KIRI-MARIE [11:08]

No, but I have to say that I've always gone, who does this area world class? And I have literally gone, so if I look at speaking, I remember thinking, okay. If I'm going to give voice to what I'm thinking, I better become a really good speaker. Who do I know out in this globe?

And I remember looking up Lisa Nichols. And I don't know if you've ever met her or had the privilege to do anything in her space, but she is a phenomenal speaker. I've never heard anyone tell this story. And you know when people repeat this story time and time again and you go, it's this story again? I've heard her story so many times and I'm still fascinated.

And so, I learned that I don't need to be great at everything. I need to find out who is phenomenal at that area and then exercise that kind of muscle and become better at it. And then, I realized that I could do that with everything and it's just been the best thing. So, it's not necessarily one person. It's like, what is the area that I need to learn and who does that? And I go for the world's best.

I've had the great privilege of being at the table with so many amazing leaders across the globe and it's been really intentional because I've looked out for them. I've worked out how I can be at that table with them and I've learned from them. And because of that, I believe I'm a much better person and I've got more skills and I'm able to speed things up in life when making decisions because I've got lots to come out on. And that's what's exciting. I get excited about that because I go that means there's so much more I can keep learning and for me and my brain.

CAMILLE [13:05]

That is a good thing. I think that you and I are very similar that way. I love studying people. I love self-help books. I love learning what it is, that success leaves clues like Tony Robbins says. So, can you think about times in your life where you were able to adopt a pattern or a system that changed your life and how were you able to incorporate that into your life for success?

KIRI-MARIE [13:29]

That's a great question. I think there's been some really amazing patterns throughout life. And I think one of the first steps and a lot of people will look at me now and before, the boarders were doing what they were doing, I was traveling the world. We were nomadic as a family which meant that literally my office just changed locations. And so, we traveled the world. What I saw when I was doing that was some important things to put in place and I thought, what are those things that help me to be the best I can be to give out the best? And one of those is daily routine.

I'm really strict on that. I'm strict on getting up, getting straight into movement of some sort and stimulating my senses. So, it might be as simple as going for a walk and not having headphones on and listening to the sounds of the birds or the humans when they're walking past, listening to conversations, getting you hearing, listening to a place that maybe if you just do things out of routine, you don't think about. I love taking photos, creating those moments that you just saw the sun rising and it was the most stunning thing and taking a snapshot of that, so later I can remember that moment that I thought, wow, that was amazing. And for me, I'm a woman of faith, so I go, "There's something bigger out there that has my life under control." And I can tell you that's been a great thing. Because when I'm in control, it doesn't always work. So, that gets my seeing happening and then it's things like smells.

So, behind me, if you could see it from the podcast, what I have is I have the oils going. I love the smells. I love what that brings. I make sure I put great oils in there. I love to see and be in great locations. Why? Because I think it really reminds you that there's more to life than just behind the computer, just behind getting up and doing your work. I do these things not just because it's great and it makes me feel good, but because it starts my senses going.

And here's the thing. When I have conversations with people, I'm able to listen better. I'm able to see you better and I'm able to actually connect and feel where we need to go for this. And that's because I've already started there intentionally. So, things like that, they seem so simple and I just consistently do that. Like I was going to say before was my life is not always been this bed of roses. And by the way, it still isn't, but it's a lot of people see my life and go, "Wow. She just gets it all and things like that."

The thing that I did for many years was every time I would start thinking about a next decision, I would go no excuses, no limitations, no buts. Yes, I've got a butt, but not that "but" I'm talking about. I'm talking about the b-u-t, no buts. And here's the thing. We've all got a story. We've got excuses that we can go back to. And we've all got limitations. There are many limitations. I've not always been the smartest kid in the room because I'm majorly dyslexic and so I've had to learn how to learn. And now, I know how to access my brain. It's pretty cool, but there's things like no excuses, no limitations. There's always a but, "But I can't do this because I've lots of children or I can't do this because I'm really busy." We've all got those buts and we've got to figure out, what are our drivers? What are the things that are going to actually change us from "buts" to go "and?" "And yes, I'm a mom and yes, this is a priority and so is my work because it's where I have a voice." Does that make sense?

CAMILLE [18:02]

Yeah. I love that so much. I love the power of "and." We talked about that a little bit when I was on your podcast. And I feel like creating a system I think that's really interesting that you're dyslexic. I have a son who is as well and I think he's right in the jungle of, "Then what? What am I capable of?" and really feeling disempowered from that? And so, I'm curious. As you're leading and give our audience a little bit of a taste of what it is that you do on a global scale with leaders because I think that's really interesting, and then we'll go into how our listeners can create a system to create success partners as well in their own lives and in their businesses.

KIRI-MARIE [18:47]

So much to play with. All right. First thing, your son. Here's the thing. For many, many years, I was a different kid. I was the one that didn't think like anyone else. I didn't sound like anyone else and I certainly struggled with school work, but I was determined that I wasn't going to be the dumbest in the class literally. So, I worked really hard to get really good marks, but then there was the odd topic I just couldn't grasp which was science. I found that so difficult in school and the reason was because I couldn't relate it to anything that made sense to me. It was almost like you're trying to get me to learn Chinese, but I can't understand it because I've not got anything in between to make it connect.

And so, here's the thing though. For your son, what was my downfall it looked like, what was the things that made me so different has now become my genius side. It literally has because I don't think like everyone else and I don't do things the same way and because of that, my results are really different. So, what do I do now? How do I use that for me? I get to sit at amazing tables like I said with really global leaders. Many of them have been presidents of countries and big movement shakes, the next scientist innovator, the pioneer kind of leader, and it's been phenomenal.

And the reason I decided that that was probably a good table to be at was because lots of decisions are made there. And I realized with all the years of work of working on the face or the forefront of humanity really was that the decisions made at top decision tables actually were having a bigger fit and they were the ones that were affecting what was happening on the front line. So, I figured what if I could sit at those tables and help to narrow the gap from what is seen on the front end and needed to actually what is being innovated? And so, I get to do a lot of that and I do that with a lot of leaders going, where are you at at this moment?

My favorite question is, if nothing was stopping you, what would you do? Who would you be? And so, we just play with that. We get the biggest vision that you can ever go for and by the way nothing's too big. Nothing's impossible because we can always find those solutions, those pathways to that result, and then, we just make sure that we know how to narrow that gap from problem to solution.

So, I get to play with a lot of pioneer leaders, innovators, cutting-edge people that want to take their leadership and not do it the same way and go, it's time for us to disrupt the patterns we're seeing across the globe and do it in a new way. And so, it's not always easy, but that's the fun bit. I've done life. It's not always been easy, but there's always a solution. And I think that's the exciting piece about it.

And I get to work with extremes. And sometimes, it might be someone that's worked in corporate coming into the entrepreneur world. That's a big extreme for many knowing how to coordinate that. It could be the momma bear that has been the momma bear for many years and had a profession many years ago and now wants to really do something with that and build with that. One of my oldest clients and she's been with me I don't know maybe six years, a long time, and she's 75. And she's still transitioning from a full-time career in the health industry and trying to leave behind her footprints and her legacy of building out a business and she is the most fun person to work with and is just willing to play full hand out.

So, I think one of the things about it all is yes, I get to work with amazing people, but there's awesome humans everyone in the world and I think the biggest thing that we've got to remember is that the problems we're seeing are only problems that are major because it's happening in so many places and it's not out of control. We have control in what we can do and what we can change in our sphere. And if everyone was just doing that, it would actually shift what is happening across the globe. And so, I try to just work with whomever we can to get what you can do with what you've got in your hand and I think that that's the most important piece.

CAMILLE [23:57]

Yeah. That's very powerful and I love your slogan that it's playing big is a must and social change is a necessity. So, for setting up those patterns of success for rewiring for success, what are some first steps? So, you ask them what their ultimate big dream goal would be and then what? Someone listening right now, what would they do?

KIRI-MAREE [24:19]

Yeah. So, big deal, the big vision, so I call it your V-spot just because I like stirring a little and if you get those letters wrong, it could be a bit wrong. So, imagine saying that in a corporate setting, "Let's work on our V-spot" and you could just see those faces. So, anyway, I like a bit of fun in life. So, your vision, you really got to know what is the outcome you want? What's the big result?

So, it could be the next one thing that you're working on. I don't believe in building businesses. I believe in building ecosystems. And so, for me, it's like what's your big ecosystem that you're wanting? What is the ultimate goal? And that evolves at time, it never changes. It can evolve. So, I remember when my big goal was I just wanted to increase distinctions at top decision tables to help narrow the gap from problem to solution.

And yes, that's part of what I do. So, increasing distinctions meaning I don't talk about diversity. I see humans first and that you bring your distinctions and that adds value to the table. So, that was a big vision of mine at one point. My vision hasn't changed at the top level. And so, in the middle really is what if a human looks for the global lens of humanity as stakeholders? Humanity meaning you and I, stakeholders meaning the measure of value that we have, and then what if we use that lens every time we're making a decision at the table? Would that change culture? And reality is yes, it would. And so, that's my big ass goal in the middle, the vision that I'm working towards.

Then what you need next is the four pillars. These four pillars are the things that will hold your vision, that will make sure that it doesn't matter what happens, what pathway you take, you're always going to be doing a step towards that bigger vision because they are the foundations that hold that vision. Then I look for things that are going to indicators for shifting along, knowing that you're shifting along. How do I know that I'm even heading in the right direction?

Because with some of these big visions, some of these big outcomes, the next result that you want, sometimes there's a lot of moving pieces and it's not as easy as just setting a goal and going, I'm going to go and head for that. So, how do we shift towards, how do we know we are? We need to have indicators, markers, things that show us that we've got movement along that pathway.

Then the other thing that is really important is drivers. I don’t know about you, but I'm not that motivated just to get up to work 9-5, I really am not. I'm not that person, but I love what I get to do and the work that I do and I love even the crazy hours that sometimes I'll do. Why? Because my drivers are so strong. They're not just about me and my family.

One of them is patterns. One of my drivers is patterns. Why? Because if I could hack a new pattern, figure out how we can do that smarter, quicker, more effectively, then maybe that can help more people to get to where they need to get to go even faster. So, patterns is a big one. Culture is a major one for me. One of the things that I said earlier was I didn't have that amazing home ground awesomeness in my background. Building out the culture that you get to live in, that I get to live in becomes really important to me. It's a driver because I always want to make sure that every human has a voice and is given a voice. So, if that's the case, then getting out to do my work, getting out to do some of those crazy hours to do the work that I have to isn't hard work. It's part of what I'm called to do. It's part of my decision DNA.

So, it's vision, it's pillars, it's markers or indicators, shift indicators, drivers. And yeah, they'll give you pathways. Ultimately what I do is I literally design solution pathways to help you narrow the gap from problem to solution. That's what I do. And so, we need lots of pathways. The world is forever changing. We have variables. As a momma bear, we don't know when our kid's going to be sick and sometimes, we got to take that time out. I had a son that was born with special needs. I would spend ten weeks in a hospital with him and everything else would have to go on the backburner. I needed to know that I was still heading in the right directions, but I had different pathways. And it was okay that I could have effortless flow while I'm on this part of the pathway, and then I just come back into another pathway when that time is right. We have all have seasons. We all have times. We all have those moments when life throws us a big one. It's like what if we could be prepare for that and then have different pathways, all same vision? The vision doesn't change, but sometimes the pathways there do.

CAMILLE [29:54]

I really like that. I think a lot of times, it's easy for us to get hung up in, "This can't work for me now because of this." I have a lot of friends who for years haven't even considered what maybe their vision or purpose is for their life as a whole because they put that part of their brain on standby during the years of motherhood which there is so much beauty in being present in that and that that's fantastic. However, I think I love what you're saying about that's a pathway, but you're still leading towards a goal that you have for yourself, your legacy, or the footprints you plan to leave behind. As a mom, raising six kids and now is a grandmother, what were some ways that you were able to continue that purpose while you were raising your children?

KIRI-MAREE [30:45]

Yeah. So, firstly, I'm a GG, not a grandma, although that just means the same thing, but it just sounds better in my head.

CAMILLE [30:53]

It does and it's funny my sister calls herself a GG.

KIRI-MAREE [30:57]

Here's the thing about things like that. It sounds so stupid, but when we say words, it really means something. So, grandma to me or nana, I never wanted to be called a nana because it sounds like this gray hair old person that I was not ready to embrace at that point, but I was really ready to embrace being a GG. I think that's life though. I think even when you're in those seasons, going back to what you just said before, in those seasons, it's okay to be in those seasons. What we need to know and it's great to be present in that moment, I know exactly where I want to go in the future, but I'm very present in the now. And I'm really present in the now because I'm really secure about my future if that makes sense.

CAMILLE [31:45]

Yes, it does.

KIRI-MAREE [31:46]

And I think that is a real key, something that not many people are necessarily good at doing because here's the thing. If they were, many more would hold bigger dreams. So, some of what I'm doing today is a 20+ year vision. I've held onto that for that long. I've known that I'm called to that, but the timing hasn't been right.

And I always ask the question, when you're in that season, am I making decision right now because this is what is priority right now? And if the answer is yes, so going back to a real-life situation, I got a crossroad. I got headhunted to do this amazing role in Sydney when my son had just had a major operation. Now, I had a crossroad at that moment. Do I take that role? If so, I need to get a full-time care for my son. Do you know at that time one of my drivers is family?

One of my priorities is family and, at that time, I felt that I was going to be able to help my son more than what a care could to help him get to his next level. And so, I chose to at that time not to pursue my future in the professional world. And what I didn't know when I made that decision was that that was going to be a 10-year decision. And I really became again fascinated with patterns.

And so, my son actually was born with half his brain, totally brain damaged and speckles on the other side. Now in medical terms, what that means is that they don't live or if they do, they're total vegetated state. Now, I had heard that, but my result at that table was not going to be that situation. So, I fought to keep him alive right from birth and then as he grew up in his younger years.

But one of the other things I really decided was this. All of us have all these brain cells and I don't know about you, but I learned in school that we had all these brain cells that we never use and I just went down this rabbit hole of going, okay. We have all these brain cells we don’t use. What if we could actually wire to some of those brain cells? And then, I literally put all my work into my son and we found ways at every different level for my son to find different ways to wire to a different behavior. Here's the thing. My son now who was not meant to even survive birth let alone the first year of life is now 21. He never shuts up. He can talk beautifully. He's smart ass. He thinks differently to most people and I love that about him. And it's just fascinating our brain at what we can do if we give it half the chance.

So, go back to that original of what you were saying about the seasons, about how do you then keep to that when you're a mom, when you've got kids, all that side of it? Like I said, the vision never changed. I held onto that dream. I held onto that vision, but at times at those crossroads when I've had to ask those questions, what is my non-negotiable now? I've had to choose family. And when I say had to, it's a non-negotiable, so it is a had to. And so, it's a had to because I made that a priority.

Here's the thing. There comes times when you've got to go back to what I said earlier no excuses, no limitations, no buts. When we start using that as an excuse, when we start using that as a limitation, when we start using that as a but, "But I've got to go and do this," do you know what? Maybe there's a better way that we could do it. Maybe now is the time that I get extra help because he's actually okay now and he's good. You know what I mean? And so, those are the times.

Actually, part of that bigger vision is this and now let's move into it. Here's the good thing and this is what I love about it. And anyone that's going through challenges, anyone that's in that season, I'm in that non-negotiable of my family is now and I've got a bigger vision, don't lose heart. Hold onto it because here's the exciting piece. What you're learning in your challenge, what you're learning in that moment that might be taking you to a darker spot in life that it's really hard to get out of there is actually a time where you can learn amazing things. And I would not be who I am without having gone through the stuff that I've gone through in life. It has taught me resilience. I know because I see others go through it and they go, "How do you just almost troop through that?" And I go, "Because I've got the skills. I've got the tools that I've learned along the journey that have built up a resilience. This is just another mountain I've got to climb. Now, I'm using my muscle and it's getting bigger. It's getting better."

So, I think those things are really important that when you are in the season, being in the present with it, work through it, learn through it, embrace it, even your failures. I did that for a year and a half. I literally set myself a task. I wasn't good at failing. I’m now a reformed perfectionist and that is not actually beneficial when you're building out businesses and organizations and things like that because you've got to learn how to fail. And fail is not a fail. For me, failure is a learning ground. What am I learning through this? What can I now take with me to my next level? How can that look? What does that need to look like? And that has been amazing in my world.

CAMILLE [38:22]

I think that that is one of life's greatest lessons is learning that failure is the learning process. It's all about failure. The things we do right are just the fun little jolts of excitement along the way because really the whole purpose is about learning.

KIRI-MAREE [38:41]

Yeah, okay. So, wait a minute. When you say the fun jolts and I can feel people they're, "Yeah, but this challenge isn't fun. I’m not finding it fun." We've just gone through a couple years for many people where it's been tough. So, how does that work?

CAMILLE [38:58]

No, I'm talking about the fun in between the learning.

KIRI-MAREE [39:04]

I love that.

CAMILLE [39:06]

Yeah. The moments in between, you're like, "What? This is pretty easy and good," but those are the rare moments where in between everything else we're learning something.

KIRI-MAREE [39:17]

Those are the times you breathe. You refuel.

CAMILLE [39:19]

Yes, exactly. Yes, those are the breathing moments. What would you say with leaders that you work with and for your own life and experience, what are common hurdles for success? Moments that you see a lot of people get tripped up.

KIRI-MAREE [39:35]

Yeah. So, one of them is permission at the table. I believe everyone has permission to be at the table. And so, that's whatever table that's meant to be that you're at. So, it might be at the bordering table. It could be setting up your own business. It could be going for that role. And I have to say it's one of the biggest reasons that I see females not doing what they're meant to be or could be doing or maybe need to be doing.

And I think on the opposite side of that, if we're rewiring to a new pattern, we already have permission. And that is a really different thinking. I've already got permission. I don’t need to ask for permission. I don't need to go and convince and work my way up. I've already got permission. That really changes everything. So, I think that's one of the biggest hurdles.

I think another hurdle is that we have been so stuck in the old approach. And what I mean by that old approach is things like we are used to the system telling us this way. We are used to conditionings, things that have always been like that. We've always done it this way, those moments. We're used to things like biases. We can't have that person in the team or we can't have that one in the room or no, they won't be good. And so, we've judged before we've even been enough to get the added value that that difference may bring to what we're building out. So, I think things like permission. I think things like what was that one that I was just saying? I got lost in that one.

CAMILLE [41:24]

The biases.

KIRI-MAREE [41:26]

Yeah. So, the old approach. It's the old approach to the new approach. So, if we were to rewire to a new pattern, it's we need a new approach. Instead of being told how to do things, what if we could think for ourselves? What if we could ask questions? Use different lenses? That's a new approach. What if we were not to just do it the way it's always been done? What would it look like if we were to do it a way that we feel could work, that we could actually have a solution to a problem?

And I think I see so many coaches and consultants and speakers and they're all just rinsing and repeating and doing it exactly how it's always been done. And we're wondering why it's just doing it all the same way still and we're not getting the answers. We have got to be willing to. Are we even curious that there might be a new way to do things? So, I think that's another hurdle.

I think that the other hurdle is that many identify gaps, know the problems, but don't have solutions. In other words, we know that maybe we default to some of the things that aren't helping us, but what if we have things, solutions that actually could be helping us and not just helping us to get a quick fix now, but give us sustainable solutions?

And I think that's a huge part of it is that we're working on the quick fix. We don't look at the long term. And a lot of the time is the things that stop people from doing that is things like, "I don't know how to do that. I'm not confident. I'm not sure. I don’t have the skills. I'm not even sure what you mean when we talk about having money and then building wealth from that. What do you mean?" Let's find out. Let's be educated. Let's do things that maybe we could learn more and then evolve. And I think that if we were to rewire to a different pattern, it would be a human race that know how to evolve and not willing to just stay the status quo.

And I think that's the other side of it is and probably one of the other big hurdles is that it's really easy to see other people that are successful and to judge them or to make them feel not good and you feel better because you're not at that stage. What if you just were like, "How have they done that? I don't like that bit, but I love that bit. I want to be able to do that. How did they do that?" What would that look like? And instead of tearing down people because here in Australia, we've got the tall poppy syndrome which is literally if you're doing really well, we try to pull you down. We try to make you feel less. And what if we instead of did that, we actually celebrated with other people, got excited as soon as we saw someone had an amazing win? They got their house or they had access to a lot of money so that they can then go build houses for villages over in Fiji or whatever it is that is success for you. What if we celebrated with them and we were the first to encourage them? Those things would help other leaders to actually not have these hurdles as well.

I think we have got to a point and one of the things that I saw massively in all my work throughout the world and I actually began writing a book about it, but I decided when there was a pandemic that this wasn't a good topic and it was, I saw what I called isolation. And I saw it as an epidemic amongst leadership, amongst really the human race. And, of course, the pandemic hit and we all talked about isolation. And I was like, everyone's going to think I'm writing because of that, so I changed and I went to a total solutions side of it.

But anyway, with isolation, what happens is that us as humans, we're fighting for whatever we have to. And I think as a momma bear you have to be careful not to do this, I've got to be the mom that does the stuff at home. I've got to be the mom that has got to be at every event, that's got to be turning up, looking good, sounding great. Yes, no. I just got out of bed like this kind of moment. And I think that those are the moments that we have to be really careful that we are being us, not what the world wants or not what our expectations of others around you are.

Because I think any time that we are setting ourselves like that, we are going to fail because we can only be us and the best us is us. And I think the best you is you. And we don't need anyone else to be you. We need you to be you. And I think that as a leader, it has become so important and you can't do that on your own. You can't isolate. We have to do it together. We have to support each other. We have to do this journey together and we need to see each other, hear each other, and have each other's backs. It is a time in life that I feel we need to have each other's backs even more. And when you don't have those things, when you get stuck in those hurdles, that's when you just can't move forward at all.

CAMILLE [47:22]

I love that way of thinking because it's so easy for us to feel isolated even if we're living next door to someone going through the exact same thing. Life is hard and yeah, opening up and having vulnerability is where solutions are found and where progression can happen. I love that idea. Now bringing this full circle for the mothers who are listening and in regard to you working with those teenagers and saying they would leave and go right back to their old ways, what is a parenting tip for helping teenagers to create healthy patterns and systems in their own life?

KIRI-MAREE [48:05]

Absolutely. And I love this because guess what? This is where we're an ecosystem. It's not just as a mom. It's in your business. It's in the culture that we're building out in whatever we're doing because here's the thing. When you are a mom, you're still that person that would then go out, I don't change. I’m still me as a mom. It probably drives my kids nuts, but I know it does in some ways because sometimes they're like, "Can you just let your values down a little?" I'm like, "No" and there's reasons to it.

But here's the thing. I think the best tip that I can say for a mom is first love yourself, first always look after yourself, and then the other side of it is role model. As a parent, we are the best role models for our kids. If they see successful in your life, even if they don't choose to do it immediately, they literally default back to it.

What do I mean? I mean things like it's easy to tell people what to do, but if you're living it, then I see it. One of the lectures I give my children and I do give them a lecture and you'll hear why is this, "I don't ever want to hear you say this again" is one of the things I say. What is it? My daughter complains about having organic food and I said, "I don't ever want you to complain that you get organic food." There's a reason I give organic food. I think it's the best pre-health thing better than health insurance, better than giving medication, doing all those things I can give my child. Now, when you need those things, sure.

But here's the thing. If I had had that springboard where health was an important thing, I don’t think I'd be struggling with some of the health issues that I got later in life because those things are important. Why do I think it's important? Because it's the best thing I can do to help them have the best start, have a life full of energy.

Exercise, same thing. We do that as part of what we do. I lead it from the front. We do it as a family. It's a non-negotiable. Why? Because it makes our brain work better. We're better at our school work. We're better at our work, whatever it is. Those are things I can role model. I teach as I do and I don’t just tell. And I think that is the best thing we can do as a mom is that we can be the best role model. Use what's in your hand. It doesn't mean you have to give them everything.

In fact, here's the thing. I often think that actually, some of the best lessons I learned was because I didn't have everything. It was because I didn't have access to all the finances, but I got good at what I did have. I made sure that every little dollar I had that I was using it wisely. What does that teach our children when we do that? That they can be wise with their money and maybe when I've got access to more, which is what I have these days, I'm really good at what I do with that money, see it puts in great things that you don't even know where you'll use it, but that watching our kids and they take it onboard. And there's things that become their default systems because it's all they knew. What if there were healthy things we were being and role modeling from the front end? And I think that's the best advice I can say to a mom is love yourself and be that role model with what you've got in your hand.

CAMILLE [52:02]

That's a good quote. I love that. And I've got to ask you really quick. What does the exercise look like when you're working out with your kids? What do you do?

KIRI-MAREE [52:11]

Yeah. So, we just make things fun. Here's an example. We have literally just purchased two little puppies. God help me. I didn't need more work, but I've chosen to do it because I want the kids going out on daily walks. I want the kids having fun in the environment. We've got a couple of properties and the one that I'm in at the moment is out on the bush and there's beach everywhere. If they've got puppies, they've got to exercise both puppies and we get to go for walks.

So, it's making fun things out of exercise. It's going, we love acai balls. And so, we're going to for a swim and then how about we jump into our boat and we go across to we call it the mainland to Noosa and we're going to go walking down the street and get acai balls? What do they get? They get swimming. They get fresh air on the water and then they get a walk. So, it's making things fun, having some rewards and amongst it, but it's the more you do on a daily basis, our kids are jumping on the pool all the time. Why? Because they love it. They have fun. They're doing all these diving fun things and then expecting me to think that I could do that. And I'm like, "No." And they make up all these crazy games in the pool.

And one of the things that I have with my children and it's what I do with my work, it's what I do at home. It's what I learned from the road as well, having conversations. Conversations with your children, do that while you're having fun. You were talking about the Nintendo thing. I hate playing games, but I have to tell you. I have sat there talking to my son around games, still don't understand a single thing, still got no idea about the videos he watches, the music he listens to, but we have a great relationship. Why? Because I got interested in him.

And I think when you can have conversations whether it's you're going for a walk and you sit at a café and have a conversation with your family, it's the conversation they come for. They get the exercise as the bonus. When my daughters are going for swims, they try to interrupt me on my work days, "Hey, come for a swim, mom. We really want you in the pool." Why? Because they want my company. They want the conversation. It's there yet the bonus, we all get to have a swim and a break in the day.

CAMILLE [54:50]

Yeah. I love that. I need to move to Australia going for a swim to go get an acai ball.

KIRI-MAREE [54:58]

Acai ball, yeah.

CAMILLE [54:59]

That sounds amazing.

KIRI-MAREE [55:01]

I learned acai balls, it comes from Brazil, the berry in Brazil. Oh my goodness. They are the best. So, my daughter's autistic. And so, when she gets very obsessed with some things and acai was one of those things. And literally for six weeks, we just rented out this beautiful Airbnb on the water and we just invited all our Brazil family and they literally hung out with us all the time. And it happened to be that they had an access this family that had the Airbnb to an acai farm. And so, every morning, they would literally bring liters and liters of acai. And my daughter, she pretty much ate most of it.

CAMILLE [55:49]

Wow. That's so amazing. I feel like we have been so well-fed, just like those acai balls and so much for leadership and parenting and motherhood. I love what you're all about. I was just nodding my head the whole time because I'm so in line with your message. Please tell everyone where they can find you online.

KIRI-MAREE [56:08]

That's a great question. You know what? What I really love is if everyone could look at the 1% percent movement and I'll make sure you get the link because sometimes, it's a little tricky and I don't understand why, but the theonepercentmovement.com and I want everyone to think about this. What is the 1% you're going to commit to? So, I'll ask you. what is the 1% that you're going to commit to? And what I mean by that is for me, it's getting 1,000 names of awesome humans who are committing to their 1% in the wall of humanity. I want to know that whatever you're doing next that you're committing to helping adding value to the humanity going forward. So, what's your 1% if you were thinking forward?

CAMILLE [56:59]

I think my 1% is encouraging women to discover their purpose and their why. And that's what my freemium is on my website that people can sign in for and receive. So, if you go to mymommystyle.com or camillewalker.co, you can receive that free access point where you can get in touch with your purpose and your why and know that there's so much more that you have to offer than right now you may imagine.

KIRI-MAREE [57:26]

Okay. I love that. So, let's even get smaller in that. Is it 100 more women doing that a week or is it 1000 over a year, 3 years, 5 years? These are the indicators that we actually know that we're shifting this forward.

CAMILLE [57:45]

Right now, my email list is at about 10,000. So, I think another 1000 would be great over this next year.

KIRI-MAREE [57:56]

There we go. So, in the next 12 months that you get 1000 more added to that. And I ask that you put that up on the wall of humanity. So, imagine if everyone else does that, then that's how they can get hold of me and get into our world. And I'm on every other social media.

CAMILLE [58:18]

I'll put the links below.

KIRI-MAREE [58:20]

I just wanted to get more people adding their value because I think if we all make decisions that we're going to add value to humanity going forward, not take away, then culture can change.

CAMILLE [58:31]

I love that. You are brilliant. Thank you so much for being on the show today.

KIRI-MAREE [58:35]

You're welcome. Thank you for inviting me.

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CAMILLE [58:38]

Thank you so much for tuning in to this week's episode of Call Me CEO. If you heard something that you loved, please let me know. Any review on the podcast or following or subscription is so helpful to me. And if you're looking for how to discover your purpose and why, go to camillewalker.co or mymommystyle.com. You can access that free 5-day challenge in both places. It is my purpose to help you find yours and I cannot wait to connect with you next week.

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