Have you ever considered how you can create meaningful connections? In this episode, Camille welcomes Emily Siegel, a coach and the podcast host of The Connected Mom Life, whose mission is to help moms create meaningful life-giving friendships.

I personally think the more healthy you are in all of your relationships spaces, just the better you’re going to show up in each of those spaces.

— Emily Siegel

Emily shares her journey in how she was able to establish relationships after moving to different cities and how she shifted into now creating a community for mothers to let them know that they’re not alone in motherhood. She also gives her advice on how you can make the first move and how your mindset can affect the friendships that you have. 

Ultimately, our friends are supposed to lift us up. They’re supposed to be life-giving.

— Emily Siegel

If you’re wondering how you can find meaningful connections whether as a mom or a business owner, tune into this episode so that you can listen to Emily’s advice on how to be open and connected in making new friends.

When you know yourself, it’s so much easier to share yourself. It’s so much easier to give grace to other moms. It’s so much easier to not read in to things that aren’t anything.

— Emily Siegel

Resources: 

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Connect with Emily:

Visit her website: www.theconnectedmomlife.com

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EMILY SIEGEL [0:00]

The true secret that we all struggle to believe is that most people actually are craving more connection. The research says this. And so, it's so much easier to feel confident and to keep those conversations going or even start those conversations when you know they maybe are looking for connection too. It's okay for me to start something. They're not going to be annoyed by that. They're going to welcome it.

[MUSIC]

CAMILLE WALKER [00:31]

So, you want to make an impact. You're thinking about starting a business sharing your voice? How do women do it that handle motherhood, family, and still chase after those dreams? We'll listen each week as we dive into the stories of women who know. This is Call Me CEO.

Hey, everyone. Did you know that dozens of studies have shown that people who have lasting meaningful connections live longer, have less health problems, and are overall mentally happier? Today's guest is going to help us dig into how to create meaningful mom connections. It's Emily Siegel. She is the podcast host of The Connected Mom Life and she talks all about connection.

And I will tell the two questions I get the very most is how do I make meaningful connections making friends and how do I make money online? So, I'm trying to help you with both of those things today. And if you are looking for a community, I would love for you to join me on social on Instagram @callmeceopodcast or on Facebook, we have a group there as well, at www.facebook.com/groups/callmeceopodcast. I would love to create opportunities for you to create meaningful connection. Let's dive into this episode, so we can hear more about it.

[MUSIC]

CAMILLE [1:49]

Today is very special. I say that a lot, but this time, it's a really unique day because we're going to be talking to Emily Siegel about how we actually create connections that matter in real life as mothers, your everyday mother's bestie. Mother's Day is coming up. That must be why that came out of my mouth.

But Emily, I was just saying before we came on the line today that I get two questions over the past 10 years I've been creating content online. Number one is how do I make money from home? And I help people with that. And number two is how do I make friends? It is a question that so many people are dealing with and there's so much loneliness and I cannot wait to dive into this with you today. So, thank you so much for being here and please introduce yourself to our audience.

EMILY [2:36]

Yeah. Thanks for having me. So, my name is Emily and I'm the founder of The Connected Mom Life, which is a podcast and a community that is essentially dedicated to helping you not mom alone because I think we all become mothers and we're told about these villages and people say, "Yeah, you need a village." It's like okay, so does that just happen? And then, it doesn't and then you're like, there must be something wrong with me. I don't know what's going on, but man, this is hard to deal alone.

And so, I am just so happy to be encouraging and supporting moms to really seek out their villages and yeah, stop doing mom life alone. Hard enough in general, and then to do it alone is whole other layer of hard, so on a mission to see that come to an end.

CAMILLE [3:24]

I love that. Take us back into the journey of how you decided that this was the niche that you wanted to focus in on as you started a podcast and switched gears. Tell us a little bit about how that happened and why this topic means so much to you.

EMILY [3:39]

Yeah. I started a podcast a couple years ago specifically for corporate moms. I just felt like there wasn't enough content for working moms who were just doing all the things and actually liking their career too. I feel like there's a lot of conversation about sometimes how to get out of your 9 to 5 and I was like, can we talk also about some of the nice things about having a 9 to 5? And yeah, being a mom and what that could look like. And yeah, it's hard, but here's how we can manage through together. And I still really care about that topic.

I think what was hard for me was as I got more and more embedded in the working mom space, there was so much pressure to talk about equal pay and just all these things that were never really my driving forces for having this conversation. I was more looking to create community and connection and just knowing we're not alone in this working motherhood thing. And I have moved multiple times over the course of my life, two times, without college and school and all of that. And I just found making friends as an adult was so stinking hard. And I was always talking to other moms about how hard it is to make friends.

And so, that's how I just felt pulled to shift the conversation to, okay, we don't need to just talk about the working mom life and how we do it all including how we see our friends, but let's just talk about connection in general and how do we all lead lives where we just feel connected to ourselves, we feel connected to our people, we feel grounded, we're not running around like crazy people and we truly feel like we have a support system and a village? And when I thought about what could I talk about all day every day and never get bored, that was essentially what I could talk about all the time. And so, that's how I landed here.

CAMILLE [5:39]

I love that. I always thought that so often, as a married couple, you try to fulfill every need that your partner or your spouse has and there are different parts of our personality especially as women that we need camaraderie, we need support, we need the, "Does this happen to you?" and to hear that it's normal and that you have days of frustration and losing your mind. And then, also just that conversation and that girl talk that cannot be supplied by our significant other.

And I think honestly that that's been one of the things that has helped strengthen my marriage the most is when my husband and I have given each other that encouragement to seek connection with good girl friends or for him, his good guy friends to be able to get out and act silly and connect and have that commiseration together. Would you agree?

EMILY [6:38]

Yeah. I personally think the more healthy you are in all of your relationships spaces, just the better you're going to show up in each of those spaces. And for sure, I talk with moms all the time who really resonate, they just think, "Oh my gosh, yeah, I want friends, but I'm also just so busy and okay, my kids, my husband, partner, that's enough for now. That's a lot of connection right there."

And it's like this lie we try to tell ourselves like, "No, this will be fine. This'll be enough. I love these people. These are my people. This should be enough." But it isn't. It just isn't. We feel like there's a part that isn't fully seen or understood when we only rely to be connected with our partner and our kids because at the end of the day, they can't see all of us. They can't see all of our facets.

And so, I think finding those connections in multiple areas of our life including really quality good female mom friendships can just be so restorative and life-giving. And then, of course, there's actually research studies that show you how powerful friendship can be on your health, but we'll just assume we know all of those.

But just in general, it's how you feel when you come home from an amazing chat with a girlfriend. You just feel lit up. You feel like you're on cloud nine. You just feel like the kids can be extra whiny tonight and it's not going to set me up. There's just so much life you can get from that commiseration. So, yeah, totally agree with you.

CAMILLE [8:21]

I love it. Let's get to the meat and potatoes of it. How do we make the time to create meaningful connection? And also, maybe this is a follow up question. What do we do when we're feeling shy? Because it can be really scary to put yourself out there. So, what would you say for someone who's listening and is thinking, "I really crave those meaningful connections? Where do I even start?"

EMILY [8:45]

Yeah. Two biggest, hardest pieces is time for us moms, which is so daunting to think about adding one more thing to our plate, and then two the nervousness, the awkwardness, all the mind games that come up. Those are two really big and really real hurdles.

And so, oftentimes I find it's helpful to spend time helping supporting moms through both of those. The mindset piece and just digging in and understanding what feels hard for some moms, they feel like, "I'm going to be judged." Some feel like, "I've just never really been great at friendship." Some are just like, "I hate the awkwardness."

So, sometimes it's just initially figuring out, okay, what feels hard for you about it? Because sometimes, that can help think of some different strategies. But in terms of you know you need friends, you know you want to make that space and that time, a lot of times, what I do help moms think about is, okay, what are you craving most? What do you think would help you fill up the most? Is it one or two friends with kids the same age? Is it just someone to text here and there? Just thinking about what do I actually want?

Because we're all scrolling social media and we're seeing what everybody else or what we think they have and sometimes we just need to take a step back and think, okay, what am I actually really craving right now in terms of friendship? And then, that can really lead you into thinking about, okay, where am I going to most likely find it?

Because again, the time is so limited. I work with moms to put together a strategy like, "You're only going to focus on one to three places max or three groups or three people at a time ever because you're just going to stretch yourself so thin and you're going to constantly feel it's not working. You're not getting any traction if you're trying all the different places all at once."

So, that's really where I encourage moms to start is think about, okay, what am I really craving and then thinking about, okay, if I'm really craving a mom friend who has kids the same age, where am I likely to find someone like that? And then, from there, thinking about strategy.

So, a lot of times, that might be daycare like you're going to find other working moms at daycare or other stay-at-home moms at a moms' group. And so, deciding where am I going to put my energy and my effort, and then moving forward with that plan, and then not stressing about all the other connections that you're not necessarily investing in.

I think sometimes, we have all this guilt about, "Shoot. I saw that mom and I could have had that conversation, but I couldn't think of what to say." And it's like I don't worry about it. Choose your one to three things you're going to focus on for just the next three months, and then you can just not stress about all the other potential interactions that come your way that you don't necessarily take advantage of, if that makes sense.

CAMILLE [11:50]

Yeah, it totally does. I think that there have been times and I am an extrovert by nature, so this is something that for me, if I see someone at the park and our kids are similar ages or even if they're not, I'll say something like, "Your boy is so cute. How old is he?" And then, they'll say, "They're 4" or whatever. And I'll say, "My son is that age too. It's so fun that kids become instant friends. I love watching them do this and that. Do you guys live close by?"

And then, it just creates something and I have legit met and kept friends that I've met at the park. It's like dating in a way. It's weird that you're like, "Can I have your number?" But more often than not, it's more comfortable if it's someone that I see often. It's someone that I see at preschool drop-off or in someone else's case, daycare drop-off every day that it creates this familiarity of, I know who they are. I know they live somewhat close by and we have something in common. Our kids are the same age. So, it's like a good starting ground. Would you agree?

EMILY [12:58]

Yeah, for sure. And in my experience, so I have kids, they're 8 and 5 now, I found making friends when they were little harder particularly because I was working. And let me say it. When I first had a kid, we had just moved, so I knew no one. And I joined a moms' group like a moms' workout group and went every day. I wasn't even there to work out. I literally was just trying to find other people that looked like they had kids the same age as mine and that was great.

But then, I went back to work and I'm like, whoa, this is a whole new level of hard for finding connections with moms. Even at that daycare drop-off because everybody was stressed going to work, and then even pick-up, everybody was stressed trying to get home to make dinner. And so, I came up with this strategy there of eventually I could get a sense of who they were hanging out with or even the teacher would tell me that.

And then, I sent little notes home and just said, "Hey, Amy's mom, Robbie either talks about Amy or the teachers say that they're hanging out a lot. I'd love to get together for a park play date some weekend. Here's my phone number." And that was huge for making daycare friends.

And I'm also like you at the park, I do the same thing because I was really strategic about I'm going to hang out at the same park close to my house all the time because I'm more likely to meet people who actually live nearby and proximity is huge in terms of accelerating a friendship and just having more opportunities.

So, I just try to keep putting myself in those spaces and I love that you just asked for the number. I tell moms, "You can ask for a number in a first meeting without it being weird." And they're like, "You can?" I’m like, "Yes, here's the formula." You do exactly what you did. You mentioned something that you connected on. I always like to say, "Coming to the park is always more fun when there's other kids here," and then I say, "Do you want to exchange numbers? I can let you know the next time we're coming to the park and if it works for you, great."

And what I love about that is in the middle of this little formula, you ask for the number right away, you give a really low-pressure example of how you're going to use it. So, it doesn't feel like, "And you want to be my best friend and talk on the phone every day?" I'm not asking for your number for that reason. I'm just like, "Hey, that was fun that they played together and we didn't have to be constantly doing all the things. If you want to recreate this, I'll let you know the next time we come. No pressure."

CAMILLE [15:43]

Yeah, I love that formula. And I think that it's oftentimes, more often than not, someone in the shoes opposite you wants the same thing you do, but they're afraid to ask for it. It's putting yourself out there. It's being the first one to make the move, which is always a risk, but the worst thing that can happen is that they say, "That's okay," which in that case, it's like, okay, then you're not a good fit and that's fine.

But I love that you were saying, "Let's meet at a common ground" where it's a non-threatening scenario where it's like a park where you both go to and you don’t have to worry about having people in your house if you are not worried about not knowing them well or whatever that reason might be. So, I think that that is super helpful.

What would you say to moms who have older kids? Tell me why you think it's easier because in a way, I think it can be a little bit harder because now, I have children who are junior high age and they're teenagers and they're busy. And I am running in the car all the time. I'm like, "I don’t have the chance to see anyone." So, what would you say to someone in that scenario?

EMILY [16:57]

Yeah. I think that it is leaning a little bit on your kids to see where they're making connections with their friends and seeing what opportunities you have to connect with the mom or dad. For now, right now, my kiddo, my 8-year-old made a neighbor friend and it's just texting with the mom because eventually he'll want to go into each other's houses and there's just also a level of safety that you want to feel comfortable with.

And a lot of times, I just want to have a conversation with that parent. And so, sometimes that can be in for like, "Hey, I love that the boys are hanging out right now. So fun. Robbie's been asking to go inside. Would you like want to meet in a driveway for drinks later this week or something just to meet? And they're becoming friends. I'd love to get to know you too." Just to get in there.

And then, you're probably driving your kids around to different activities and sports. Sometimes, you're watching them. So, sometimes it's just even coming in with the strategies of, okay, now I happen to be sitting next to these people watching a baseball game or doing this, how can I take advantage of the fact that we're all here together and I have the knowledge that I know we're all craving connection?

Some of them don't know that. Some of them think that I'm set on friends. That's the thing we always think. We're like, everybody else is good. It's just me feeling this way. And the secret is that that's not true. You said it yourself. The true secret that we all struggle to believe is that most people are actually craving more connection. The research says this. And so, it's so much easier to feel confident and to keep those conversations going or even start those conversations when you know they maybe are looking for connection too. It's okay for me to start something. They're not going to be annoyed by that. They're going to welcome it.

CAMILLE [18:56]

Yeah. I'm curious if you have ever coached anyone through how to end a friendship that is toxic. Do you talk to people about that a lot? Probably not a lot, but have you dealt with that sort of thing?

EMILY [19:12]

Yes and no. I definitely would say there are moms that I've supported that are just realizing they have friendships in their life that are just maybe not serving them very well. They're not getting a lot from it. And so, usually I don't like to tell people what to do. I probably just said all these things about what you should do, but when it comes to letting go of a friendship, I will coach moms through thinking through that process of reflecting on, "Okay, next time you hang out with this person, when you leave, when you're done with that, how do you feel afterwards?"

I do a friendship audit with a lot of moms. And as part of that audit, they list out different connections in their life, people that they consider to be friends at different kinds of depths. And then, once they have everybody listed, one of the questions you go through is you reflect on how positive do you feel about that connection? Are you always walking away from that connection feeling down, feeling depleted?

Ultimately, our friends are supposed to lift us up. They're supposed to be life-giving. And obviously, there's going to be ebbs and flows and people are going to be going through things and you might have to be giving them more seasons than they're physically capable or emotionally capable of giving you with whatever they have going on. But you just want to pay attention to does that season ever end?

And if not, one, it doesn't mean you have to say goodbye to that friend, but the reality is that, and this sounds a little harsh, but if they're not actually giving you anything, it's not necessarily a friendship. That's a charity case that you've decided to keep investing your time in which you can absolutely do. But also know your time's limited. And so, I just want you to be really clear on who you're spending it on and whether that is a good investment for you.

Honestly even as I'm saying this, it all sounds very harsh. I don't say it fully this way as I'm working with a mom through it, but I really do challenge them of, "Your time is limited and I'm not saying cut them out, but maybe you do want to look at how much time you're truly investing and how much headspace and emotion you're putting into it, and maybe just create some new boundaries for yourself."

CAMILLE [21:39]

Yeah. I like that you talked about it being that time is an investment and the truth of the matter is we could have hundreds of people that we love and we want to be friends with, but what it comes down to it, you do not have the time resource to invest as much as a friendship needs in all those hundreds of those relationships.

You really have to pick at the end of the day, which can be for some really challenging. And for a lot of us, it can even be hard to make really meaningful time for even just two. And I think that we need to give ourselves permission to do an audit. I think that that's such an interesting concept of really analyzing what we're giving and what we're receiving and how that's either adding or taking away from our life's happiness.

EMILY [22:35]

Yeah. It's really interesting, so we're currently moving from our state that we're in and we're going back to our hometown. So, we have some established connections there and I've been really thoughtful about how I want to end our time well and how I want to not say close out friendships, but say goodbye well is the phrase I've been using.

And I just saw a girlfriend that I hadn't seen in maybe a year or two. We've only lived here eight years. And she was one of those people that I've always known, man, if we lived closer, we would be best friends. And the reality is that we just don't. It's too hard to get together. There are just too many barriers in our way to having the type of friendship that we know is possible. The conditions just weren't right for it and so luckily, we both just have an appreciation of each other.

But it's bringing some of that thought process to our connections and to our friendships and I just had coffee with another friend who again, I had not seen in years. We only lived here eight years and wanted to see her and catch up before we officially left and finally making the time because I'm leaving. And it was so interesting. We Voxered a little bit after, which is a voice app and she's like, "I'm having some regret over our friendship was taking off, but then there were some moves and just some stressors in both of our lives. And it just faded and it shifted."

And I didn't have any hard feelings. I didn't think she had any hard feelings about it either. Honestly, it was more stressors on her end and she was just feeling so apologetic. And I'm like, "Oh my gosh, no. I'm so grateful for our friendship. I so love and appreciate you and also just remember that was a crazy time. There are no hard feelings. It is what it is and I'm just so grateful that we can pick back up and just get back together and pick back up where we left off."

Yeah, I think sometimes we get so worked up about the ways people are or are not investing, but the reality is that we only have so much time and we can always appreciate people and know there could be more if the conditions were slightly different, which is sad. There really is a sadness to that, for sure.

CAMILLE [24:56]

Yeah. I think of when we were in school and it was like in elementary, junior high, high school, college, you live in this universe of friendship where it's like you have the same classes every day. You see the same people every day. You have hard trials you're going through together because you have the same assignments or the same social group or whatever it is.

And then, as an adult, that your universe totally changes where it's like to be able to access those friends, you have to go to the outer space really because it's like you're in this nucleus of your own world. And then, you're like, okay, what's out there? I need to bring some of that into my world.

And one thing that you brought up that I really liked and maybe you'll know if I tell you, but there was someone that was doing a talk and it was someone like Mel Robbins, but I don't think it was her. And she was saying something about, "You want to have people in your life who if you imagine everyone as a candle and you all have a flame, that you want people in your life who are not candle blower outers." She said something like that.

EMILY [26:06]

Yes, I know the person.

CAMILLE [26:08]

The reference, who is it?

EMILY [26:09]

Yeah, Brene Brown talked about that.

CAMILLE [26:12]

Brene Brown, that's who it was. I was like, okay, I can't remember who it was. Yes, Brene Brown. And so, I think that that's such a good visual for ourselves to think of in the reference of Brene Brown, she was talking to children and saying that you want to teach your child this, which absolutely you do, but I do think that each of us does have that flame. And we're like is that flame blown out or does it feel more alive after I'm with this person?

EMILY [26:40]

Yeah. I know as moms, we are so crazy busy that half the battle is just making space to reflect on how am I even feeling about my friendships? And getting really clear on what feels really good about them right now and what's feeling hard about them. I think sometimes, if we can create that space for ourselves, it's a lot easier to address what's feeling hard versus just letting the noise just continue to come in and influence that for us. So, yes, I loved that analogy that she shared about teaching our kids just to pay attention. That's so key to how is this person either enhancing my flame or diminishing it?

CAMILLE [27:28]

Yeah. It's really interesting. And I learned this at a really early age and I don't know where this came from or how it came to be, but I found that I've always felt like energy attracts energy. I don't know if you've ever been around someone and you can just feel that they have a lightness and positivity and a generosity about them in their energy, in their aura. I know that sounds woo-woo, but legit, I have a sensor for that of someone's energy. And I know almost immediately if we're going to be really good friends.

And not that that hasn't happened, I didn't automatically know, but usually I know pretty quickly if this is someone that will be in my life for a long time or not. And I think that listening to your intuition and your gut of is this a person that you could really invest in is worth taking the time? To ask that question of ourselves and see if it's someone that lifts you up and makes you feel like you are of value or maybe that makes you feel funny.

I have certain friends who when I'm with them, they make me feel so funny because they think I'm hilarious where other people make me feel smart. And other friends of mine make me feel really listened to. And I think that that's what's so beautiful about different relationships is they can bring out different parts of you.

EMILY [29:00]

Yeah. I'm a huge fan of paying attention to energy and intuition and are you feeling this? The only caveat I sometimes give is if I'm working with a mom and I can just tell she's carrying a lot of baggage around friendship, she has a lot of insecurity around female friendship, and she's maybe been really burned in the past, and so sometimes that intuition, we may have to work through a little bit.

Because she'll tell me stories about conversations she's had with other moms. And she's like, "I don't know. I just don’t think she's my person or she seems too judgey." And I'm like, "Okay, let's unpack this a little bit just to understand was this truly an energy vibe or were you influencing that in any way with the energy you were bringing?"

I often tell this story when we moved the first time without kids or dog and I was trying to make friends without the context of school and I thought it was so hard. I thought it was so hard to make friends. Everything I tried just didn't feel like it was really working. And I ended up reading this book and it was about a girl, very similar in my situation, she's like, "I'm just seeking my best friend forever in my new city."

It’s not like I don’t have friends. I just I don't have friends in this current city and you start to feel like there's something wrong with you of, I don't know. Everybody lives in this city and they all have established friendships. I don't think they've got space for me. And that was basically the story I was telling myself and I didn't realize it at the time.

And so, in hindsight, I know that in some of those interactions, I was bringing in energy of pre-rejection of you're probably set. You're probably not that interested in me. You're just being polite. And so, that's what I thought about so many of those connections. And then, once I read this book, I learned that actually no, people are really interested.

I found myself in this book club in our condo. We packed 30 people in a 2-bedroom condo pre-COVID and there were all these women there who didn't live in the same city their whole life. And they were like, "No, I want to know my neighbors." I'm like, "Okay. You want more friends even though you technically have a lot of friends already. You have space for me."

And that was just really powerful for me to understand, okay, no, people do have more space and that story I've been telling myself was not fully true. Some people have been at that capacity. There's always people that are at capacity at certain times in their life, but for the most part, people are usually pretty open. And then, I started walking around like everyone wanted to be my best friend and, oh my gosh, my connections exploded every night because I was bringing a different energy.

And so, 100% I think energy attracts energy and that was when my circle exploded was when I had an energy of, of course, you want to be friends, why wouldn't you want to be friends with me? And then, for whatever reasons it doesn't work out, but it's not because they didn't necessarily want to be my friend or just the timing wasn't right, the conditions weren't right, whatever.

CAMILLE [32:16]

Yeah. I love that so much that you talked about that because one of the questions I did have from the very beginning is do you feel like to be able to create really great friendships, you have to create a really great friendship with yourself first? Because if that's not in place, then you will bring that energy of not feeling like you're worth the love or the connection or that friendship, which I think will kill it from the beginning, just like you were saying.

EMILY [32:49]

Yeah. I have a group for moms and there's two pillars that we put our stake in the ground around our work. And it's first knowing yourself, so you can share yourself. We're all evolving. None of us are perfect. None of us are perfectly healthy at any given time all the things. You can definitely have friends when you're not in a healthy state.

But I do think the more you're just self-aware of yourself, what fears and insecurities you carry, that can sometimes influence your energy or influence the story you're telling in any given scenario, friendship or not. I just think it is so much easier when you know yourself, it's so much easier to share yourself. It's so much easier to give grace to other moms. It's so much easier to not read in to things that aren't anything. So, just that's really what I like to focus on with my work with moms is it is the how-tos of how to make friends, but I find that it's really that deeper inner work that actually makes it feel easier and more fun and ultimately more life-giving and authentic in those actual interactions.

CAMILLE [34:11]

I love that so much. If someone's listening to that right now and they're starting to recognize maybe that within themselves that they do need to invest time in themselves and create a greater connection to who they are, what are some best first steps that they could take in that regard?

EMILY [34:29]

Yeah. I think we talked about this a little bit, but even just stepping back. One of the questions I like to ask initially with moms is on a scale of 1-10, how are you feeling about your friendships? One being like, oh my gosh, what friendships? And 10 being like, they're amazing. Why are we even talking about this? Of course, they're great.

And so, I'll say most moms say 5 without a doubt. That's usually where everybody starts. And then, I ask them, "Okay, if you were going to rate yourself a 6, what would change?" And I think there's something so powerful about just naming, okay, taking stock of truly how you're feeling about your friendships and your connections where that is and when you have a slightly smaller understanding of what you're looking to change, then it is easier to understand, okay, how can I promote that? What can I do? Can I put myself out there?

In terms of getting to know yourself, just follow your interests. I'm always a huge fan of personality tests and tendencies and just trying to undereaten what's making me tick at any given moment, but just taking that pause to pay attention, just pay attention. That's literally the first step in any self-awareness work is just paying attention to how I'm feeling, maybe okay, I'm feeling this way, I wonder why?

It's just continuing to reflect and try to understand that. And then, always if you have someone to process that with, that can help surface more things too. Yeeha, I would say that first step is pay attention. How are you feeling? And if you want to explore that more, lots of resources that you can dive down into.

CAMILLE [36:20]

I think that this has been an awesome conversation. I know that there is such a need for this. I feel like the pandemic had put us all into a tight little box where we were very much involved with ourselves and our families and to-dos. And now, it feels like the world is starting to expand again and to feel more expressive and connected and I love that.

So, if you're listening to this right now and you're thinking, "I need to take stock where am I in my friendships? What do I need to do for myself? And how can I help and grow beyond that, so that I can connect and really grow?" And I just really want to say thank you so much for being with us today and please tell everyone where they can connect with you and hear your podcast.

EMILY [37:05]

Yeah. Thank you so much for having me and I'd love to support moms that are just feeling like friendship is harder than it probably should feel. And so, all of my resources are on my website www.theconnectedmomlife.com. There's lots of free supports, guides. I literally will give you scripts on how to talk other moms to cut the weirdness and also cut to the chase, get out of the small talk zone, some of those tangible practical strategies.

I have also a really helpful template on just even finding the time and space for connection each month without constantly feeling like you're an event planner, and then also some different courses if you're really wanting to go deeper some courses. And then, I would definitely invite moms to join our group. We call ourselves the mom friends. And it's a space where we're all really investing in our local and real-life circles while at the same time investing in ourselves and having a small little online group where we can process things within a really safe space before going out into what feels a little scarier in our real lives.

CAMILLE [38:18]

Awesome. Thank you so much. And for anyone that is listening, I hope you know you are worth taking the time to invest in yourself and in friendship and it will change your life. So, Emily, thank you so much for being my new friend. This has been such a fun conversation and we'll see you all next time.

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This episode is brought to you by Station Park who believes in women-led businesses that are changing the world. If you want a place to come visit to dine, shop, or connect with your loved ones, Station Park is only 20 minutes away from downtown Salt Lake City and has a gorgeous outdoor dining and shopping experience that you can walk among the shops and create memories that will last forever. If you happen to be in the middle of the square, Twigs Restaurant is right there in the middle, one of my very favorites. You've got to get the pesto margarita chicken and end the night with the dipping donuts. Trust me. Tell them I sent you. It will change your life.

Thank you so much for listening to today's episode. If you found this helpful, please subscribe and/or come and talk to me on social media. I'd love to hear from you. DMs are always welcome. I want to hear about what meaningful right relationships and friendships mean to you. And if you would like to be included in the newsletter, please go to @callmeceopodcast to find how you can get weekly updates of our shows and free resources. You can also go to camillewalker.co to find more free resources to discover your why and creating more purpose in your life today.

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