204: Stepping into YOUR Power. From I Can’t to ICON with Sarah Foley

Sarah: 0:00

And so I got really good at getting seated, but it took some time. It takes practice, it takes a ritual, it takes a a nurturing of that for you to get quiet enough to hear yourself. So know that sometimes it won't happen the first time, but the more you do it, the louder and more seated that voice gets.

Camille: 0:32

So you want to make an impact. You're thinking about starting a business, sharing your voice. How do women do it that handle motherhood, family and still chase after those dreams? We'll listen each week as we dive into the stories of women who know this is Call Me CEO. Hey, everyone, if you're looking to be an icon in your very own right, in your very own skin, sarah Foley is the person that needs to talk to you today. There are so many amazing nuggets in this episode. I was furiously taking notes. I think you will too. So buckle up and let's get started on how you can be the icon of your life.

Camille: 1:14

Welcome back everyone to Call Me CEO. This is Camille Walker, your host, and here we celebrate women and mothers building business that are changing the world, and today's guest is certainly no exception to that role. It is Sarah Foley, who is the creator and founder of the Icon Speaker Academy, and I recently met her at a networking event and was blown away by her energy, her ability to light up a room and really shine her light on other people. And today we're going to be talking about how to step into your own iconic power and influence, and how to do that with confidence. So, sarah, thank you so much for being on the show today.

Sarah: 1:51

Oh my gosh, it's such a pleasure I'm so excited for today.

Camille: 1:54

Yes, oh my heck. So I recently have realized that my superpower and my strength is meeting people face to face. I love virtual, I love this, I love podcasting, but I feel like there's a different energy that comes to actually getting together in person and filling each other's energy, and that's something that we crave in human connection and I love that what you do really helps people to be in the moment and to become themselves and speakers and to get up on the stage. I mean, that's something that takes a lot of guts to do.

Sarah: 2:30

It takes a lot of guts, but there's definitely a strategy behind it and I'm glad that you talked even just about that simple act of presence and being here now. Right, I think we can feel it when even you're at a networking event and you're meeting face-to-face, but they're constantly scouting the room for either a better conversation or what they might be missing out on. And there's actually ways that we can tune in and, yeah, we could even get into some of those today, but it's, it's fascinating when you actually do get with someone and you're like there's a million people around, but I feel like I'm the only one here in this conversation with them.

Camille: 3:09

You are so good at that and I love that you brought that up because, as you were saying that, I literally had a flashback memory to going to an influencer event probably 10 years ago, and this woman came in that I know and she walked up next to me and she said, okay, where's the who's, who and who do I need to talk to? And immediately it went from you know, she sees me there and it wasn't even really a hello, it was just like okay, speaking her thoughts, like who is the most impactful person that I need to sit beside to, like get a one-up. You know, it was very like it just gave me that yuck, Like look. So when you said looking around the room and seeing like who else is the better option for the day, Like I, I see that and I've seen that so many times. So I'm really excited to talk about that presence and really being settled in the moment, because that really makes a difference.

Sarah: 4:08

It does Right, and you feel it both ways. You feel it on a negative or you feel it on a positive. And I'll just say this because it's coming up, because this is my favorite tip, you want my favorite presence ever, yes, please.

Sarah: 4:20

Okay, it is. It is totally in the body, so I call it squaring off. And so whenever you're talking to someone I know some people, they're listening, so they can't see me but when you're squaring your shoulders off to that person and you remove any physical barriers between you and that other person, you remove, remove books, you open your hands, you remove anything that's in your hand. You literally put your phone down and upside down, or even in your hands, you remove anything that's in your hand. You literally put your phone down and upside down, or even in your purse, like you remove physical blockages and barriers between you and that other person and you square off. You square off your entire body, make sure your shoulders, your hips, your feet, everything is squared off and completely perpendicular to that other person, right or parallel, and now I don't know my geometry.

Camille: 5:07

Okay, the parallel Squared off right.

Sarah: 5:09

Yes, but there is nothing between you. And then you truly look into them, you get super, super present and all of a sudden you're going to see this shift in them, this relaxing this. Okay, I feel seen, I feel heard and, like I said, even if there's a million other people around, they're going to feel like they are the only one that exists. And you can also do this from stage, that when you are, you can feel it from a speaker perspective. When they're they're doing quote unquote eye contact, but they're just scanning the room. It's like just scan, like tractor beams. They're not even landing on anyone.

Sarah: 5:52

And I learned this from Simon Sinek. I was watching something about him long ago and he said if you can land on one person and literally finish an entire sentence holding one person's, finish an entire sentence holding one person's eye contact, and not only does that person feel seen, but now it literally will draw in everyone else in that audience. They'll completely tune in, the lean in, cause there'll be like what am I missing there? Like there is something there, what this must be important, and they're going to lean in as well. So you can do it from a big perspective, from stage, and you can also do it one-on-one in networking or with your. The biggest one is with your kids. If you can square off and get it their level, oh my gosh, it's going to do wonders for those relationships.

Camille: 6:38

Yes, I love that you said that, because immediately I was thinking kids, and then I also think about watching people on stage, where you do it almost feels like you then become a part of a personal conversation where, if that speaker is looking at someone and speaking with them, you're like, oh, like she's speaking to her, but she's also speaking to me. It just kind of makes it more intimate and less to the masses. I'm talking to no one, you know where it's. I really believe that, now that you say that, that's an interesting way to look at it and I'm totally getting ahead of myself because, sarah, please tell us a little bit more about yourself, your background, where did you grow up? Tell us a little bit more about that and how you got into this idea of sharing and growing people in themselves and on stage.

Sarah: 7:27

Yeah, so my entire life I have been drawn to the stage. There's something about it, even like a microphone or getting mic'd up, like that whole process. There's something really magical for me and it's been in my blood. My parents were performers, they were musicians and singers, and so the stage life it always just felt very much part of who I am and growing up I just couldn't wait to get become 18, 19 and move from Salt Lake City, sandy, where I grew up, and I wanted to move to LA and Hollywood and become an actress and my, my dad instilled in me to make sure you've got a good job to pay the bills while you go chase your dreams. So I became a massage therapist and ended up getting recruited at a spa in Palm Springs, which I thought was okay we're getting close to LA, right and and I would drive back and forth and do auditions all the time in LA. And I ended up landing an audition for a brand new show right there in Palm Springs and it was called Palm Springs Edge TV. It was Sarah D back in the day, I wasn't Sarah Foley and I. It was like entertainment tonight for Palm Springs and I got to go to fashion shows and concerts and all the art gallery openings everything that was entertainment wise and do interviews and hear people's stories and talk to the artists and the musicians and hear the fashion designers of what went into the line of clothing they're putting out and I got to hear people's stories. It was so beautiful and so fascinating and life, you know, it's like how do you sum this up? But life ended up bringing me back to Salt Lake and just I was.

Sarah: 9:07

I did the television show there for about nine years eight or nine years, yeah. So I did it for quite some time and and loved every bit of it. And that's where I really got very much knowledge of the power of networking and power of relationships and actually nurturing relationships, not just like your friend did, where they just get to the event and they want to speak to power of networking and power of relationships and actually nurturing relationships, not just like your friend did, where they just get to the event and they want to speak to the biggest and greatest, but it was speaking to the people there that were seeing the art gallery opening and hearing their stories and all the different things. So I just got really well versed on storytelling and camera work and it was a brand new show. So I also sold the segments, did my own hair and makeup, I wrote the segments. I sometimes set up my own camera and film this. I mean, we just did everything A to Z, so I got a lot of knowledge behind and in front of the camera.

Sarah: 9:59

And life ended up bringing me back to Salt Lake City. Long story short, something about the TV industry felt maybe it also goes back to the conversation your friend had where it was just like who do? We got to step on to get ahead and I didn't love that. It started to feel kind of superficial and so I came back to Salt Lake. I ended up going back into the spa world, becoming a spa director and working my way up there, which is where I actually learned how to run now a business, because I got to run a full department. I got to understand finance, I got to understand marketing, I got to understand, you know, managing a team and team massage therapists who are very emotionally driven and, you know, just starting to understand this big scope not only of the television world but also the business world.

Sarah: 10:51

And it was now looking back how perfect all of that truly was for my life, and while I was there as a spa director, is when I ended up getting into an ATV accident, and that absolutely flipped life upside down. I was going on a trail and my boyfriend went on ahead to make sure it was okay. He was on a four wheeler as well and his friend called me up the hill saying it was clear, not knowing that my boyfriend was coming down to let me know that it was, and in order to avoid a collision, I ended up going off the trail, hitting a ditch, flipping, and it was instant paralysis. And so life as I knew it, everything about my life, was either put on hold or flipped completely upside down, and it was this reclaiming of myself, a very long journey. I'm still on it, I feel like today, but trying to get back to who I was.

Sarah: 11:57

But that person was long gone. Right, we still have all of her memories, but she was gone, and this is where I started to understand how in control we actually are of creating who we are, and I, in a stroke of genius now, I say genius, but it was such a silly little thing back in the day when I decided to start a blog kind of showcasing just the journey through the recovery and I knew that my words had power. That was kind of all I knew around personal development and so I thought, okay, if my words had power and I want to walk again, well then I got to start calling myself vertical, and I started calling myself vertical blonde, and this name for myself, which I now while, left me extremely depressed, broken, suicidal, alone, like all the just really hard feelings, and I started to decide no, I am meant for more, there's got to be something here. I started to find the lessons, I started to find the growth, I started to follow the clues, I started to follow my heart. I found a beautiful. I called her my medicine woman, therapist, and she, at the beginning of every session, she would just have me close my eyes and ask what part of you needs you right now?

Sarah: 13:41

And I started to tend to the different parts of myself and it was through that journey that I really understood there was some power in this creation of myself, there was something to be said of this, and people started to ask me to share my story, which then I got to bring back. My love of television and stage and all of that like that, started to come back into life. And then through that, other people said well, how do I share my story? Can you help me share mine? And that's when the business side started to come back to life.

Sarah: 14:14

And so now I've got this beautiful platform, I've got such a message in the mess kind of thing, I've got the purpose and the pain and all the cliche things you hear, but it's so true. I truly found, you know, that everything had a had a purpose and it was this choreographed dance of my life, and I feel so alive these days. I feel so in love with my life. I love, truly love how things have panned out, and I also understand that I I very much was a part in the creation of how they panned out. And so now I I go by vertical blonde. That is like my brand name. I'm a keynote speaker. I get to travel and speak on different people's stages and platforms, and then I also have my icon speaker Academy, in which I help people do the same, and the very first thing we do is they decide who their iconic identity is and they start to close the gap who they were and who they're becoming.

Camille: 15:19

Oh, so beautiful I. There are so many questions that came up as you were talking about that journey that you've been through and you mentioned it was 12 years ago when we were talking before. Is that right 12 years? And I'm curious with that, with a 12 year journey. Looking back now, what at what year? And maybe this is, maybe this is too out there of a question to even ask, but that is quite the journey what, at what year do you think you went from the I can't mentality to the icon, because that is your tagline, which I'm obsessed with, and I don't know if you've thought of this for yourself. If there's even a place, you could pinpoint it, but is there it? Does anything come to mind for that?

Sarah: 16:03

Absolutely, it was year four. Okay, it was very vivid for me. Yeah, it was this, it was this transition, because I so, right after the injury, I tried so hard to get back to my spa director job as soon as possible. I went back to work within seven months, but I would go to work and I would hold it together and I was the boss, and then I had a 45 minute commute that I would ball the entire way home. I would just try to make it to my car so I could fall apart. And it was just this crazy cycle. And at year four, life ended up taking us to Hawaii and it was so beautiful, like, so grateful for that, and it was at that point where I had to say completely goodbye to the old life.

Camille: 16:47

Right, completely goodbye to the old job, completely goodbye to I was going to say did that mean you were done with that?

Sarah: 16:51

job? Yeah, yep, absolutely. And so that's when it was this blank slate and I made this complete decision was simply I please bring me healers. I would just say that prayer all the time, please bring me healers. Please bring me healers. I would just say that prayer all the time, please bring me healers, please bring me healers. And I began to open myself up to healing in a zillion different ways from nutrition, to dance, to therapy, to support groups, to writing to I mean just all the things and I started to experience that healing. And so you know, our, our, our life is a series of decisions. And that's when I truly decided okay, I'm ready, I'm ready to heal and I'm ready to take back ownership of how I experience my life. And you know, from there it's been this molding and evolution, but it was very much at that point where it was like blank slate, I'm ready.

Camille: 17:53

Oh, that's cool and it's interesting too to imagine the physical piece of it. I feel like it's almost like that hierarchy of needs where first that foundation of, like your body literally having to heal and then, beyond that, the expression of okay, but who am I now and where do I go from here and how do I express joy and get back into who I am and reinvent? That's a huge turn of events and I'm curious because you are a mother. So at what point? What? How old is your child? Now I want to say you have a boy. Is he seven? He's nine, nine, okay, so where did that line up in, like motherhood, redefining, becoming a mother, because that's another identity change.

Sarah: 18:39

Totally. Oh my goodness, such an identity change. Right and no, it's so. I had him two years post injury and the yeah, which was crazy in itself.

Camille: 18:53

Yeah, it was a natural epidural life.

Sarah: 18:59

I mean, our bodies are miraculous. My body still knew exactly what to do and he, like, slipped out. I mean it was just the easiest thing to give birth. It was crazy. And and him in itself, he's always been somewhat easy. He understands where mom's, mom's limits are and he's never really pushed it, he's never run away too fast, he's never. It's been fascinating, just his own intuition of what mom can and cannot do.

Sarah: 19:28

And and, yeah, even even through that discovery of motherhood and deciding the kind of mother that I wanted to be, you know, I think we moved to Maui when he was one. So you know, he he's still very, very little and that was that deciding factor, that was that moment of of pivot for me, of deciding who I wanted to be through all of this. So, yeah, I mean I think it just goes back to that, that decision and the fact that we can change our decision at any given moment. Right, we can, we can make a new decision. And the fact that we can change our decision at any given moment, yeah, we can, we can make a new decision and a new, just a new awareness and a new kind of point of creation.

Camille: 20:14

That's really beautiful. So now I'm getting this picture. You're in Hawaii. You're a new mom. You're experiencing redefining and discovering who you are new mom, you're experiencing redefining and discovering who you are. What do you feel like was one of the most impactful lessons? Where you talked about finding healers and really getting in tune with yourself, but how or who helped you to really identify the icon that you wanted to be? Was that something that you created for yourself or what did you have? A mentor?

Sarah: 20:42

Yeah, I had many mentors Absolutely Going back to that therapist I called my medicine woman she. So we did a kind of therapy called parts work, called IFS, internal family system, and what it is is it's different parts within us, right, but what we're trying to do is we're trying to kind of relax the part so we can get down to the core self, and that core self is who I called vertical blonde. I named that core potential self of who I am. And when we can get these parts kind of relaxed and and tended to, then we can actually hear and listen to our the core of who we are, the core of who we are. And so it was. It's not even so much a creation process as it is just a remembering process. You know, it's going back to like even, like I said, the, the performer of me, and the, the part of me that loves the stage and the audience and and the light and the, the stage and the audience and the light and the expression of it. That was always in my blood, that was always there. It was about getting back to that, it was about remembering who we are and I think so often what happens in life is that things will happen. We become a mother, we become a wife, we become a business owner, we become disabled and paralyzed with whatever it is. There's a story around it that we have, but if we remember that nothing in this life has meaning until we give it meaning, nothing it's true.

Sarah: 22:20

Yeah, I used to be a crazy coffee drinker. Triple espresso every single day. I could not survive without coffee. Now I haven't drank coffee in a year and a half. I it's not even a part of my life anymore. Coffee used to have a very different meaning for me than it does now. That is life, right. My, my disability. At one point I thought it meant my life was over. Now I realize it's this magic carpet that literally gets me into any door that I want.

Sarah: 22:51

So we are the ones that are in control of the story. But we have a predefined story of motherhood based on all the mothers that we've seen. Right, if we saw a mom that gave up everything so that she could be a mom and we saw her give up her dreams, now we've got that story. Oh God, now I got to give up my dreams because I'm a mom, right, but that's just a story that we've got. So the story is the most important thing, that, if we can understand, it's just a story and we can rewrite the story. But the most important part is the version of ourselves that's writing the story right the scared, broken part of us versus the iconic part of us. We're going to get a different dialogue in that story, and so I don't even know if I'm answering the initial question, so I apologize if I've kind of gotten off course here.

Sarah: 23:47

Know if I'm answering the initial question, so I apologize if I've kind of gotten off course here, but I think that it bears repeating that it always comes down to the story, and so when I was healing, it was remembering that I was in charge of the story and I I simply had to get to the root of what I thought things meant for my life and the. You know, initially, when I very, very first started therapy, her very first session, she said what part of you needs you right now? And it was the feminine part I had. It had been years since I felt feminine and sensual and beautiful and and flowy and creative.

Sarah: 24:29

I missed that part of me, and so that part needed me to take action to get that part back. So I started dancing, so I started doing things that actually brought that part back to life. I worked with this artist who drew and painted the most incredible sensual and feminine paintings, and she painted me. She gave me my ultimate fantasy, which was walking on the beach, and she painted me walking on the beach. So it's one listening to yourself. Two, understanding that it's just a story, it can change at any time. But then three, and the most important part, is taking action based on the iconic version of yourself, the potential version of yourself, not the part that's still retelling that old, disabling story.

Camille: 25:22

I would love to know, for people who are really trying to tap into the iconic version of themselves, what are some questions or some exercises that you have someone do to step into the idea of who that person?

Sarah: 25:35

is yeah, oh my gosh, it's my very favorite. This is what I do for every single keynote. All my clients, before we get them on stage, this is their first and foremost exercise and it is simply going through this remembering process. Like I said earlier, think of you at your fullest potential. You at your fullest potential. You lift the lid of limitation, you lift the lid of what you thought was possible. You actually go deep and you say who am I at my fullest potential? What do I love? What do I see in other people that I long for, that I crave, that I lean into and say, god, I wish, if only I could right. It's those kinds of questions that you at your fullest potential, who are you and who could you be? Who are you meant to be? Who are you meant to become?

Sarah: 26:27

And you get people writing and initially it'll be like I'm empowered, I'm happy, I'm. You know, they're kind of surface level, and then you just keep them writing. No really, who are you? What truly lights you up? What are the things that make you so unique that it's been a while since you've actually given yourself the space to dream that way. What are the dreams that come to mind when no one else is around, right, the things that you oh, my goodness, heaven forbid, I would never tell anybody else. That this is actually a dream of mine. A girl said one time it was like she wanted to do. What was it? It was like it was like crazy fashion, with country line dancing or something. It was like such a beautiful mixture that was. I'm like, yes, I can totally see that for you, you know, but it's, it's, what is the things that absolutely light you up. Maybe it's singing, maybe it's fashion, maybe it is acting, maybe it is writing, maybe it is just simply being a more present dread that it's actually going to take away. What, if it actually was meant to, to fill you up. And I think that when we get fully in that alignment actually I know when we get fully in that alignment, that it actually gives us energy, even though it's requiring more of us, because it's aligned.

Sarah: 28:09

And I think the most heavy and draining energies are obligation, people pleasing, doing it because we feel like we should. I've had so many conversations with people and they're like I'm totally chasing that dream as soon as my mother dies because she would never be able to handle it Right, like it's. These conversations of like I've only, but they've got these obligations and these shoulds. And, oh my God, what would these people think around me in my life? Like, just, there's just no way that they could in their current conditions.

Sarah: 28:44

But you brought up something so powerful, which is the hierarchy of needs and, unfortunately right. We've got what food, water, shelter, the basic physiological needs, then we've got safety and then above that is belonging. And if we do not feel like we belong, that we actually feel safe in a space of people to take the risk, we will never get to the top of that hierarchy of needs, which is our self-actualization. So it is vital, vital to your dreams that you have a space where you feel safe to take the risk. That is it, that is the core and the reason why I'll never do anything that's like just a prerecorded go do this on your own, because guess what? You're not going to do it on your own.

Sarah: 29:37

I have to create the safe container so people can actually start to take the risk where they feel safe, where they feel like they belong. Like when we start my academy, that once the doors close, the doors closed, no one. Like when we start my academy, that once the door is closed. The door is closed, no one is allowed in or out. Well, they can go out if they feel need you know they need to but no one else is allowed in because the container needs to remain very sacred. And once it does, it's amazing how these people feel confident and ready and they feel like they actually can go after these dreams and aspirations, because they've got a space where they feel safe to take the risk. And then it starts to trickle over into their lives. Then it starts to trickle over so they can do it from stage or wherever they want to do it from. But that belonging container is it from? But that belonging container is you can't go from, I can't to icon without a space to do it in.

Camille: 30:35

That is so fascinating. As you're talking about this, I was thinking about friends and family and the ideas of what people think we should be or what we think they think we should be can hold us back. I know that from looking, and even reading, a lot of people's deathbed confessions, where they would say something like you know. I regret worrying so much about what Sally down the road thought of me when they weren't thinking about you.

Camille: 31:02

You know, like there's so many times that in our own head we create these scenarios, or this fear-based action that leads to inaction, of really not chasing after those dreams. So, really creating that container of safety where you feel like you can do that, I'm curious, for if you ever speak to youth, because I'm thinking about teenagers right now. This is obviously with adults too, but how would you suggest that teenagers can feel safe, because belonging is such a strong force of action you know of I can't stand out. Do you have any advice for that? For for teenagers, do you ever speak to them?

Sarah: 31:39

specifically. Yeah, I mean it's. I would honestly have the exact same kind of conversation and just use different examples. But you know, I think about this a lot with even my little boy, you know, and and it's you go around the kids where you have things in common, but then you start to kind of mold the people around you, and so the biggest thing is understanding and doing this work in private, right, like asking yourself who am I at my fullest potential, doing it without the outside world?

Sarah: 32:14

First you're doing the writing exercise and and getting in tune with that first, and then asking yourself where am I going to find more people? Like this, versus looking for the people first and then the environment second, you want to look for the environment first, right, and then you understand that that's where you kind of find your people. Even that's why it's called a speaker academy it's those wanting to be on stage, that's they're going to be their common denominator, and so I think that that part is really, really important, even as adults. Right, it's like God, I'm having a hard time finding finding friends. Well, maybe you're trying to find them first. You need to find what lights you up first.

Sarah: 33:02

Yeah, Go there and then find your people. And then it's like, oh my gosh, now we've got all this in common and you know you, you understand each other, you can already speak the same language. It's like you can almost go deeper faster. Yes, me huge. I love Tony Robbins teachings, I love his events and I've met the most incredible people there. That's where my life really started to take shape, because we're all there to better ourselves, to grow. We're willing to do the work, we're willing to play full out. We understand what that looks like. Okay, good, now we can lift off and take off together. But I think, just knowing that first and not being afraid to go there alone, knowing you won't be alone very long, yes, ooh, I love that, knowing you won't be alone very long.

Camille: 33:47

Yes, ooh, I love that. Speaking of Tony Robbins, you were recently featured on his coaching stage and I don't know. It looked like you were virtual and he was in person, but you had attended his event a few years prior. Tell us about that, how that all unfolded.

Sarah: 34:03

Yeah, I've been going to Tony events since 2019 was my first one. I absolutely love them, they're, they just light my soul up and at each event I sort of I play really full out. Let's just say I am not afraid to be the one like dancing the most and screaming and yelling and having all the good time, and so that tends to get a little bit of eyeballs and they started to kind of pay attention to what I was up to and and you're gorgeous. So there's that, Well, you are, you are. Well. I think that goes back to living ready right like yeah, I don't wake up like this.

Camille: 34:42

No one wakes up looking like you do though, like it's not even just the way you look, it's your light, like be. You just have this energy of like being so comfortable and confident in who you are, that like you're gorgeous, it's not even even I mean you're beautiful too, but it's just being in a room with you. I was like, okay, she loves who she is and it gives permission to other people around you to do the same and to let down their guard and to be silly and out there and dance and be loud and I just love that about you. So, okay, sorry for interrupting, but I just had to add that that's okay.

Sarah: 35:24

I love that Cause I do believe that I think our energy is our currency. It is truly how we transact with life and I live. I have this, this philosophy of living ready, of I live ready and in anticipation of my biggest opportunities happening every single day. And when I do that, my energy is it's outward, it's ready, it's lit up, it's on fire because I am doing the work. Nothing is super like surface level for me at all. It's always deep. So thank you first of all for saying that. I appreciate it.

Sarah: 35:57

But I went to his business mastery event, which was virtual, a couple of years ago and you know I wanted to be one of the people that ask one of the final questions like getting a moment to ask your question directly to Tony is a big deal. So I literally went into the garage, I got my pom poms from high school and I'm like shaking my screen, I'm like I'm going to get the attention right. So I'm here, I'm loud, I'm all the things, and they called on me and they said what is your final question? And at that point I just said how do you know what your next step is when you feel so small and the vision and dream feels so big, like my dreams, feel so big and I just feel tiny sometimes in comparison to them. And he gave me such beautiful advice. He said well, cause I? I said I know one day I'll be, I'll be on that stage with you, I'll be one of you. And he said the most beautiful thing. He said that's where you're wrong. You already are one of us. But it's not that you want to be us, you want to be you. You want to be you at your fullest potential. And he said you're judging yourself too soon. And that was just like mind blowing for me. And it was this releasing of okay, I'm going to release that pressure to be big. Now I'm going to be where I am Now, I'm going to go back to that presence, philosophy, be really present, knowing that it is leading me to the bigger vision. And so he just gave such beautiful advice and from that they sort of just kind of kept their eyes on me of like, what's she going to do with this information? And if you see, a couple months ago now they reached out and they just said we've been watching you, we've been watching your growth, especially with the past year.

Sarah: 37:47

And you know, and I talked about how I'd use his business philosophies in order to do that, and they sent the film crew out and they filmed me and the story and my only request was that I got to feature my students my icons in that video. It was really important to me because I knew that not only am I teaching, but I'm learning, and when you're a leader of anything, it's amazing what happens to your own growth. Like, if you want to grow in any area of your life, lead others in it. If you want to be another, a better mom, lead a mom group. You will, in like, inevitably grow in your ability in motherhood. If you want to be a business owner, lead a meetup of other business owners. Watch how you grow. It's insane. And so I know that I wouldn't be where I am without my students and vice versa. So we've we've definitely got a beautiful bond there.

Sarah: 38:47

But, yeah, they featured it on his virtual stage and he did a really great business. They called it business accelerator event and it was. It was a phenomenal experience. It was absolutely beautiful. The people that have come into my life now because of that thing airing have just been. It's been beautiful. So, yeah, I feel so grateful.

Camille: 39:10

Oh, that's so awesome. I love that that you already are that person. It's just judging yourself too soon. I think that that can apply to so many different fields and experiences where we all are just at different parts of our journey and to be okay with that, and that it doesn't have to be everything right now, because we, too, need to give ourselves the process of growth, and that takes time.

Sarah: 39:34

Yeah, and I think that we'll only get what we're truly ready for, like, we will only get because, going back to that living ready philosophy, I'm only going to see the opportunities that I'm actively looking for and if I instinctually feel like I'm not ready for one, I'm not going to open my mouth, I'm not going to open the door, I'm not going to turn to the person to have a conversation, I'm going to block it. So we will only get what we're ready for, that we're willing to open the door, open our mouth, have the conversation and if you're willing and if you're ready, like, watch out. So the deeper and more intentional you are about doing the work not even faster, but more intentional you are the more that you can get yourself ready for those opportunities. And I know that that's why, this year in particular, things took off very, very quickly as soon as those decisions were made. That is so powerful.

Camille: 40:36

What would you say to the person who's listening right now and thinking I just am lacking the confidence of even knowing or showing up as that person, or even thinking there could be more, that maybe they're just down on their luck or health or concerns with family or whatever, whatever, whatever I mean, we have our excuses, we have our reasons, we have our situations, whatever they may be. What would you say to that person who is just wanting to gain even an ounce of confidence to take that step forward?

Sarah: 41:07

I think that's a beautiful question. I'm going to pose it in the way that it was given to me. There was a point where it was somewhat around that time of me asking the question and being a blubbering mess with Tony, I was bawling and just emotional. And a friend of mine asked he's like you're kind of all over the place, like you're doing a little bit of that, you're doing a little bit of this, like you like, what do you really want to do? And it was a, it was a permission slip for me to actually be honest with myself. So I would ask that person what do you really want to do? And when my friend asked me that, I said I just I want my whole life to be about speaking. I want to share my story. I want to, I want to do it well. I want to be a keynote speaker, respected keynote speaker. And he said then do that, but really do that. And it was. It was a twofold right. It was what do you really want? And now give yourself some accountability and ownership to actually do it, to really do it with your whole heart. Stop dilly dallying, stop dabbing your feet into all these areas. Like, really give yourself some focus and some intention of what you truly want.

Sarah: 42:27

Now it may take some time to quiet the mind enough to actually hear what you really want. We're going back to the shoulds we talked about earlier in the obligation. Like we going back to the shoulds we talked about earlier in the obligation, like they get loud. Those are loud, oh yeah, I'm reaping for a long time. But if you can get quiet, I'm a firm believer that, like our, our mind has chatter. But the reason that we have this beautiful brain is to is for strategy, right.

Sarah: 42:57

But the, the knowing, comes from deep within. It comes from our gut. Like it comes you ever notice that sometimes you'll actually hear it from a different place in your body, feels lower, feels more rooted right, and the hawaiians call this your now, your na apostrophe au your now, it is your deepest knowing, it is your seat of thought and it resides in your gut. So I would remind you, I like to say, get seated.

Sarah: 43:26

Get seated in your thought, get seated in who you are, get close and get quiet, right, quiet your mind. Your mind is meant to get you the actionable items. The mind is not meant for those deep decisions. Your gut is your deepest inner knowing is so get quiet with that and that's why I loved you know I didn't miss a therapy session for about five years, every single Friday. It was sacred for me and every single time it was what part of you needs you right now. And so I got really good at getting seated. But it took some time. It takes practice, it takes a ritual, it takes a a nurturing of that for you to get quiet enough to hear yourself. So know that sometimes it won't happen the first time, but the more you do it, the louder and more seated that voice gets.

Camille: 44:27

Oh well, that's good homework for us all to ponder on as we're listening to this. I love that to really get seated and to get quiet, especially with the fast pace of world that we live in and so many distractions, and that takes work, that takes effort and that takes intention, and I I love that you laid it out that way. That's awesome. Well, you have an incredible event coming up in September and it is your. Tell me the name of it, the iconic. Tell me the name and tell us about it.

Sarah: 44:58

Yes, it's called the icon life.

Sarah: 45:00

I am obsessed with award shows in Hollywood. I love the Oscars. I love, I love these moments where, where people really get to come and and play full out, right. So that was my whole intention of this event, of what if we created the Oscar style event for personal growth? And so we've got an entire red carpet experience happening where everyone coming is meant to feel like a star, meant to feel like an icon. This is where you go to find your people. Let's just say that, like I talked about earlier, so coming in, everyone is truly meant to play full out and that is the standard. And it's amazing the personality that can come out when people are dressed as their most iconic self.

Sarah: 45:49

And then we've got this gorgeous, old, refurbished theater that we're going to be doing it in. It's literally going to have entertainment, it's going to have awards, awards coming from people there at the event, those in the audience that won't even know an award's coming. We're going to have people on stage giving inspirational talks, teaching us how to icon up, teaching us how to actually live ready for these lives and dreams that we truly want to create and we've got after party style events. It's all very health conscious. I'm a firm believer of our energy is our currency, so we've got after party style events. It's all very health conscious. I'm a firm believer of our energy is our currency, so we've got to feed our bodies correctly. So all of that to say that this is the experience that if you are looking for a moment where you get full permission to play full out, to come iconic, to show up as this ultimate icon that you are truly meant to be, this is your space. These are the people that you are meant to be around. This is where it feels safe to take the risk. So it's happening September 7th.

Sarah: 46:51

Yes, it's going to be so fun, and we also have some different levels of tickets. So we've got some that involve the iconic after party as well. We've got some that also involve an entire event the night before, including dinner that you'll get to meet the other speakers that are coming. That one I highly recommend if you're considering doing the Icon Speaker Academy as well, because our doors will open for the Academy at the event and those with VIP tickets are going to get some extra perks going towards the Academy. So lots going on. If you have any specific questions around the event, the Academy or just ways to icon up. I love having these kinds of conversations and you can always find me on Instagram at Vertical Blonde.

Camille: 47:36

So well, awesome. Well, this has been an absolute treat. As you all can hear from our conversation, sarah is a light and she is changing people's lives, so thank you so much for taking the time to be on the show today.

Sarah: 47:51

You're so welcome. Thank you. I can't wait to see you at the event too. It's going to be fun, yes.

Camille: 47:56

I'm excited too. What am I going to wear? What are you going?

Sarah: 47:59

to wear. That's the best part when people it's like the transformation starts as soon as you get the ticket, cause you're like okay, now I got to get the outfit. Like the outfit is key.

Camille: 48:08

Yeah, ooh, that's so fun. Well, thanks again and thank you everyone for tuning in. Make sure to follow, leave a comment and share this episode if it meant something to you and could impact the lives of others around you. Thank you so much. We'll see you next time. Hey CEOs, thank you so much for spending your time with me. If you found this episode inspiring or helpful, please let me know in a comment. In a five-star review, you could have the chance of being a featured review on an upcoming episode. Continue the conversation on Instagram at callmeCEOPodcast, and remember you are the boss.